Babarado85

Chapter QS

2007-08-25T11:14:00.000+08:00

Saturday
25 August 2007

Guessed it’s has never been happier than lately, having 14 more days to go before I turn ORD, which literally mean operationally ready. Gotta know about my re-service battalion, I will be in 755 Singapore Infantry Regiment, no more Heli-Ops, but more into Water-borne Ops. Hopefully my group of friends and I will still be in the battalion block force, a minor force specialized in anti-tank. It’s gonna be fun and exciting, and also, some times of catch-ups.

Lately things seemed so smooth for me. Got my dental surgery appointments fixed in time to have my wisdom tooth plucked out, all thanks to a particular Dr Chew, the 2 separate surgeries were very successful, 7 more days to a beautiful and healthy jaw.

Then I went in search of a job, hopefully I can get one and start work as soon as possible after I’m done with my national service, so that my cash flow won’t be interrupted, and thanks God that I received 2 really keen and sincere interviews. I accepted Hexagroup’s offer mainly because the manager, Mr Lim was very transparent, honest, and aspiring(my 1st impression of him during the interview), secondly was because most of the projects that they’re handling got to do with my interest of studies, in the area of environmental protection, doing stuff like soil stabilizing, drain and bridge design. Although the job that I applied for is a Quantity Surveyor, one that’s really stress and not many would want to do, but I feel that it’s a good start-off if I look at the experiences aspect. Further more, Mr Lim is offering a rather good salary, compared to the rest of my friend. Just feel that, for a start, one inexperience fresh grad like me, and completely forgotten after army, and Hexagroup is willing to hire, it’s simply a God-Bless thingy. And here’s my new chapter, and I really hope and pray that I can attained the few goals that come with this particular chapter. I would say, Chapter QS. Heeheez … =)

Monday Bluz ?

2007-08-13T22:45:00.000+08:00

Monday
13 August 2007

So excited, very soon, I’ll be embarking into another realm of market place. Hope everything will go as plan. Just simply can’t wait to see and to get a feel of it. 07 September 2007, the day we’ve all been waiting for.

730daYs

2007-08-10T01:21:00.000+08:00

Very soon, I’ll turned ORD – operational ready. As I was recalling what to write for my blog, I suddenly feel that I have a difference perspective of thoughts and ideas, as compared to the past. Probably due to the fact that I’ve discovered what’s weak and what’s strong about me during the past 2 years of ‘low-form’ lifestyle. No doubts training and exercises were tough, especially the walks, various and numerous kind of night walks, unforgettable. But what that really caught me and captivated my heart and soul was the lessons learnt in others’ characters as well as my own. There are really many difference kinds of people who react differently to different situation. This is one thing that I never understood till now, I finally got it. Nice people you thought they were will turned out nasty as the most unpredictable time, and nasty people you’ve wronged turn out to be that angel.
Under certain pressure and environment, I’ve resorted to shout, cheat, quarrel, hold grudges, hold violence thoughts and even break down with tears. So much so that I realized it is only the times when I fully rely on God that can bring me through storms and thorns. I’ve never put a thoughts on my friends circumstances and always jumped into foolish conclusion, sometime I feel that the emotional me should just stand aside and think through (with a short prayer) before I made any hasty reaction.
At once, I used to feel that the environment I was in was very hash and negative. Thanks God I didn’t got into the highly favored ‘interesting’ bad activities and habits enjoyed by my peers. Truly, I was almost there, but really, He was always there. He, is the Jesus that I believe in since day 1. He held my hand whenever the emotional me almost got into the dark pit. As I thought about it, this is the hash that I really felt I’ve taken a lot from. A lot of life-to-life understandings of the real world. For once I think this was hash and negative, but for eternal, I know this is what’s happening right now everywhere and in every corner. People think alike.
As I’m reaching to the end of this chapter, I really appreciate a lot to certain group of people whom I’ve met while in national service, whom had really inspired me to go on, do the extra miles, and finish the journey. These people might not even be a Christian at all, yet, they’ve all the virtue of a good man, that kept my engine on-going. I believe there’re many young men who’ve experienced a similar journey as me throughout too, a journey of discoveries while in an ugly room.

Fort Krist

2007-06-20T12:19:00.000+08:00

20 June 2007
Wednesday

4th to 15 june 2007, I ‘ve been to Sakon Nakhom. Some north eastern side of Thailand. A state of certain poverty. A state where I see that most of the works are done and control by their military. So much so that they don’t even have a commercial air field. My friends and I took a 4 hour 30mins ride by Charlie 130 SAF plane. Plane was flying pretty low when 30 minutes nearer to destination. We flew past an area. Totally dry, few green trees could only be seemed every few km apart. Clouds were even brown and dusty in colour. Obviously a state of extreme dryness, poor, for the first time, seemed to vividly appear in my vision. Although I am not sure of where i was, but one thing for sure, we’re a bunch of blessed city man heading toward an eye opening world.

30 minutes time and we’re nearer to Fort Krist military air base (Thailand). Living here is obviously difference. Water condition was definitely another alien’s from Singapore. Sanitation, food, weather, and many more were difference. We had rice for breakfast, lunch and dinner, rice seemed like something really precious and abundant in this area.

Having interacted with the local, I learnt that the people here seemed familiar with basically 3 kind of cultures, Christ (what the locals call, rather than Christianity), Buddhist and Pepsi. Sakon Nakhom was difference, it’s covered with green vegetation, but weather is a lot dryer and hotter than Singapore. The forest here are heavily invested with snakes and black scopions, which the Thai claimed to be edible with proper handling.

I was offered red ants and certain tree bugs and many kind of leaves for food. Red ant tasted like little concentrated sourly salt, certain tree bugs tasted like cone flakes, though my friends claimed that they tasted like ‘wasabei’ instead. We were showed how live chicken are slaughter bared handed. Interesting, uniquely survivor.

I was really worried about the chicken here, because of the bird flu around the area. But ultimately I still had them into my stomach, in order to stay strong for the exercises.

Been here for 2 weeks, on 15 june we headed back to Singapore, for a moment when the plane reach nearer to my home, suddenly I feel like our street are beautifully light up with golds all around. (street lamps), it’s a total difference scene from North Eastern Thailand. We are really blessed. Cherish what we’re having now.

YAP

2007-06-20T00:57:00.000+08:00

20 June 2007
Tuesday

What’s really wrong with me? Was I finding an excuse for myself? Or was it that I was too much into jungle that I guess I probably had totally completely forgotten who I was?
The thought of helping out in the cell, going into the “market place”, and mixing with those rich retired man? Yeah, telling them the good news, fellowshipping with them? Going out with guys and girls of my ages? The thought of leaving the dialect ministry and helping up even more in the cell seemed to constantly tickling onto my heart.

I was in a state of confusion. I don’t really know what I really want.

Yeah, everybody is going into the market place. People are going into Shenton way, mixing with those capable people. And I am actually thinking of leaving these old folks for these able beings? Whom in the world, at least in my surrounding, have easy access to the church?

I was kinda taken aback today when I came to realize that Mr Yap committed sucide. In a moment I could roughly figured out the reason. Before I enlisted into the army, I was still singing Karaoke, having dinner and accepting his jokes and laughters and an expensive parker pen despite his bad health and financial condition. And I’m thinking of leaving them for the people who already have many Christian moving towards them?

What’s really wrong with me?

In a moment, I recapped memories of those moments when he and his wife came to church with me, those days should NEVER be a past …

Forgive me.

DNV

2007-06-03T21:04:00.000+08:00

Live further on my dream ...
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can i ??

Opps Force at She Mang Li Shang

2007-05-13T11:40:00.000+08:00

2007-05-05T22:18:00.000+08:00

2nd Mission

2007-04-21T09:08:00.000+08:00

An unforgettable mission.

It’s still vividly clear. This was the very first few missions I encountered with Aslan and Hafiz. Mango plantation nightwalk. We started moving off at 1700 Hr. All I remembered was we have been walking and walking, because the actual terrain was completely difference from the 10 years old map. The actual terrain had been completely changed by the act of God. Each time we are nearer to our objective and destination after many long walks of hopes, our road of light just seemed to be blocked by some fallen trees and debris, and we had to take the 2 to 3 hours detour and redo everything again. Dogs were barking everywhere, sound unfriendly, but we couldn’t care much at all, what’s in our mind was to quickly end these.

Along the way, all I could hear is Hafiz complaining and complaining, like a mad fussy woman. Really irritating! I really lost my 101% of respect and hope on him.

Finally when we all overcome the “she man li shang”, I was delighted. Aslan despite being more tired than Hafiz didn’t give up and overcome the obstacles with me. Whereas Hafiz as I had expected, give up half way and went back to camp. The time was 0630 hrs.

At 0730 hrs, we took tonner and proceed on to ADA camp. The picture u saw was our mission upon landing. What a challenge!

Taiwan

2007-04-20T00:27:00.000+08:00

20 April 2007
Friday

I'M BACK FROM TAIWAN !!! Finally.
Took a few pictures and experienced afew things ..
Now looking forward to 8 of September ...

Reaching the end of my army chapter and heading to a new one soon ... =p

Swollen left EYe

2007-03-04T19:31:00.000+08:00

4th March 2007
Sunday
1900
My eye lid seemed recovering, and at this pit timing, my lower eye lids start swelling and all that I’ve had for the upper eye lids repeated its history for the lower one… basically I look like a after-match rascal, as if I’ve got a serious punch on the eye due to some childish fight? Heez …
There’s just this unexplained trill and happiness in me as the days passes by. I am really seriously in doubt of my future after NS, yet I am also feeling a little kind of thrill as to what’s gonna happen to me? All the things that I have in my mind now seemed so adventurous and so risky yet I’m just “can‘t wait to see”!! haha …
Today I went to service. Pastor Tan once again talk abt DNV. Everything seemed to be linked up so well. Pastor Tan didn’t really talk about DNV, but his message was kind of link to it. And what he was talking really trigger some excitement in my heart. I’m just glad that I’m in a good church.
Okay , so what’s gonna happen in the next few days … tomorrow I’ll be going back to camp, pack up all my luggage and equipments that I need in Taiwan. Then attend some briefing for the 3 exercises in Taiwan. Or perhaps 4. 1st goes to exercise Navex (3 days 2 nights free and easy navigation exercise in Taiwan rural areas, the best and most fun!) 2nd goes to exercise ATEC stage 2 (the one that I gotta be superb ‘siao on!, cos gotta be evaluated ma …’) 3rd will be exercise high noon (probably one of the very few big scale combined exercises which include even the re-service uncles etc., gotta open my eyes and my heart to EXperIence!) And lastly, exercise recreational … meaning enjoying the shopping malls and various shops in Gao Xiong … hee …
13 March night fly off. 16 April touched back Singapore, first thing is to take Comfort home. Next thing is to pen down the wonderful stories that I had experienced during that period of 1 month. Next things is to enjoy some shoppings or jalan jalan and some rest in Singapore during the one week leaves. Once leaves are cleared, back to camp, that’s another journey.

DNV

2007-03-01T13:48:00.000+08:00

1 march 2007
Thursday
1400
Singapore exercises have finished. Indeed experienced certain “unexplained”, unforgettable experiences in the last 1 years plus. From the very big white termite queen and spider to the ghostly ones …heez. Finally on the waiting list to Taiwan for battalion evaluation. In this exercise, I got to be on my highest level of enthusiasm and excitements. Because it’s the last one.
Yesterday, went to Tradoc to have a cross-community exercise talk with the commandos and the armor. This program was really good. It gave me an opportunity to see and to interact how the commandos and the armor operate, and to know about how the future SAF gonna move. From this 2 years of serving the NS, I realized that our army are really good in planning, but we’re alittle taking things for granted here. I shall not elaborate further because it’s kind of weird to talk about such issues In a blog. I might get police knocking on my door. Heez .. In anyway, I am s 70% confidence of our army defend ability. (inclusive of the air force)
Today and the last few days was really bad, got a superd swollen eye lid on my left. Gonna visit the polyclinic later for a better cream to apply on. My eye felt so irritated and so uncomfortable and quite pain. The last few days haven’t been praying well and long enough. Words of my cousins and their success during CNY troubled my heart, shattered my dreams.
My cousins who are working in the bank industry shared with me about their views in the civil industry. Things don’t seemed too positive on my side. Leaving me in wonders and confusions. Leaving me in doubts and alittle sadness. Is that DNV(dream and vision) from the divine? Really from God or am I self-deceiving? Somehow I got a really peaceful feeling everything Pastors preached about it, but when I look into the current happenings through these people, things are quite bad on my side!
Or am I really misunderstanding again? Sometime I got the strong tendency to thinking that things gonna came out and end this way and it did not go the ways I thought it supposed to be. Thought. I always thought and it never happen. For the last few major incidence of my life. That left me kind of, Aizzz….
But then, true enough, God is a balance God. There are also certain incidence that left me in confidence that God is with me and whatever things that are happening are part and parcel of His ultimate plan. I have to do my parts too, and for that, I find myself no match to Him, my part required a lot perseverance for a bigger apple and give-up for a personal orange, I admit I have failed God many times, but today I am still not giving up. Just as He had never a time give up on us since the day of Pentecost. He had never at one time let me down but I think I have let Him, and myself and others down many times.
Anyway, time is still moving on, and I am getting near to ORD, I hope I have influenced my soldiers to a certain level, though I couldn’t see the result with my naked eye and heart, they’re always letting me down, but I hope certain small issues were amended in their heart, meanings certain small seeds could be inside them. I hope my last enthusiasm in Taiwan could contribute certain things into their life, regardless of belief.
After that I got my personal plans, less focus on army after coming back from Taiwan. Probably from mid-May onwards till September.
6 fighting fit men now left with only 2 willing to fight really left me in utter disappointment. I really have no mood to behave like a commander at this time. Sometime I doubt their injuries, yet I couldn’t doubt their honesty… soooooooooooo difficult. That’s probably how a sergeant taking over 2nd years NSF soldiers would feel. I would prefer taking over newbie soldiers and trained them all the way till they ORD.
DNV …

Exercise Pegasus

2007-02-16T23:25:00.000+08:00

February 16, 2007
Friday

Finally! Today marks the end of my training in Singapore terrain, at least for the moment till my re-service period. =) Exercise Pegasus, one of the toughest exercises throughout my entire NS life. It began on 12 Feb and ended in the afternoon on 15 Feb. Yes, I spent my birthday and valentine day in Lim Chu Kang and Mandai. Haha! But it was really awesome! Probably these are the only time I spend these days in the forest? And yes! The stars, the beautiful stars, these are the last few nights I spent looking at my local sky in the dark, in the vegetation, alone.

12 Feb 2007 I moved out from Mandai Hill Camp with the advance party to recce the place. I reached my deployment and killing ground at around 1730 hours. And I was there all alone till 2200 hours when my friends finally arrived. I spend that few hours looking at the stars and reflecting through memories. Haha .. there’re really a lot of things to think of.

What really caught my pen to record down was my mission 2. I was with the jeep again. We’re supposed to destroyed enemies blocking on a single bridge which had denied our movement to our destination. Upon giving a surprised fire of 8 anti-tank rounds, the enemies only declared 1 tank destroyed out of their 3. Our movement was still blocked and we have to retreat. We retreated, but into the Lim Chu Kang Cemetery. In the cemetery we spent a long time planning for a route to get into our destination. Finally we decided to off the light of our jeeps, and move tactically through the grave sites all the way till our final location, to prevent being spotted by the enemies. Since it was pitched darkness, I decided to use a NVG (device that look through the night) to follow the jeep in front of me. The driver drove carefully while I gave him the directions. We came across a series of vertical poles that divided the road into 2 parts, one down slope and the other up slope. The jeep in front of me was at the right side of the poles but my driver drove into the left side instead, he stopped. I then confirmed with him that the jeep in-front of us was on the right. So he reversed back and drove up the slope. I was rather surprised when the jeep tilt 45 degree left, the road we’re traveling on doesn’t seem to be a vehicular path! I was about to ask the driver to turn right where the jeep in front of us did, but the next thing I know was, the right side was actually a vast area of sea body! The driver and I was confused! But all I care then was that we’ve break contact with the main body! So we decided to move ahead, tried to turn a-bit here and there, it looks like we’ve really break contact. We couldn’t find the rest of them. So we decided to drive back to the sea spot and wait there. Approximately 15 minutes later, the front jeep came back.

It was here that my 2 other friends behind me in the jeep spotted strange encounters too. They borrowed my NVG and look around. They really scared me off when they ask me if I saw an enemy at the sea spot when we drove up the slope. Nope, but they saw. And I really scared them off too when I told them that the driver and I were following a jeep that drove right into the sea instead! Haha … Was I too tired or was it really those kinda … heez …This exercise really open my eye wide and experienced some kind of unique encounters. =)

ATEC

2007-02-03T14:14:00.000+08:00

02 Feb 2007
Friday

I’ve never regretted being in 1SIR. Never regretted being in SISPEC Alpha Coy. Never regretted knowing a God I’ve know. 1SIR was the place where I was really being appreciated by many, where I regained my confidence in my abilities and about myself. Though the battalion is always last minutes kind of, but it really prepared me for the worse. I know some of my life best friends are found in 1SIR Charlie. We had fun, we “hit it!” and “tear!”, and “more more!”, “not enough” … ha!! Some of the common slogans we used in those days. It was a place I will really remember deep inside my heart. As compared to my days in BMTC Tekong, it was totally different. I don’t like the days in Tekong, I don’t think I would even wear the platoon shirt from Taurus.

Just recently, my battalion completed our ATEC Stage 1 (battalion evaluation). We got a high recon 1. Praised the Lord. Now we’re preparing for ATEC Stage 2 in Taiwan. Through history, no one SIR battalion had ever scored higher that Recon 2B, I hope we can make history in Taiwan.

And after Taiwan, many big! things gonna come in. 1SIR will be preparing our 50th anniversary in Singapore. Hopefully I can march with honor in the white No.1 with the rest of my friends. Hopefully I can hit the tanks in Taiwan, together with SPIKE and MILAN and complete the mission. Come back with bonds deeply tied with fellow 1SIR leopards and fighting pride deeply burnt in my heart. After ORD, it’s these fighting Spirit that I’ve experience that still gonna be applied into my civilian life. Over-coming the mountains, looking at the positive potential of my colleagues rather than mumbling at their errs, taking all tasks and do them with pride, and in the end, be ready to be appreciated.

Come to think about it, this year 2007 gonna move really fast for me. In just spit time, I will be back from Taiwan. Heez … my last exercise, Taiwan ATEC stage 2 evaluation. Month of March to April. =)

A Metal Box Wrapped in Plastic

2007-01-13T23:13:00.000+08:00

13 January 2007
Saturday

WooOoo~~~!! Praise the LORD ! Friday I just came back from a series of 5 days raining training in Tekong. Thinking that we’re able to book out on Friday night, all were in our most high moral. Who would ever guess that we actually lost one signal set! And the guy who lost it is from my platoon. HQ is most responsible for the company most crucial equipment, as a PS of HQ, I definitely play a role. Although I am not directly involved and need not pay any account to it, but I do play a role in standing up and being there for my fellow store sergeant and my signal man. When talking and asking of the situation from LCP ZG, his lips were pale and shaking, he is obviously scared. My fellow friend who is in-charged of the store was also stunned. This reminded me of last year, exactly around this time, when a friend from my detail lost something really important too.

I thought to myself, in our 2 years of NS life, we actually started off our year with finding lost of important SAF equipment! Haha …

Without further ado, we did the same thing. But this time round was my man instead of my friend. And we all have to … yap … “comb”. We tried our best to comb the part of Tekong island which we have been through. To our disappointment, we couldn’t find it at all! We’ve been through old malay village, old BMTC school, all kind of errie errie places. Could it be because I’ve brought LCP ZG to the old BMTC school to explore that causes him to lost his equipment? Just like last year, when my whole detail went to see the haunted hut at lower mandai? Haha …

Anyway, God is great! I messaged my friends and ask them to keep me in prayer. While I myself at a point of time in the afternoon where it was raining and the search couldn’t really carry on, made a little prayer too. My CSM, who is a muslim, pray to God too, he prayed till tears drop!

Just a few hours ago, we did another interview with those involved. Then we search thoroughly again. I went to draw the stores keys and we all searched every single box again!! Guess what !! we FOUND it!

It was actually inside a box, covered by plastic bags! God opens our eye! Everyone was so relief! Some of us break down and tears drops. Some of us almost got ourselves into the army prison. Woooo~~~~

Through this incidence, many mentalities and perspective have changed. God is such an awfully divine one! =) Halleilujah!

September

2007-01-07T10:11:00.000+08:00

7 January 2007
Sunday

i am really looking forward to September. Now it's January, i've got 4 months to go for a divine agreement with God and 8 months to go for a agreement with the nation. Heez heez ... i really miss my pink IC. It's not that i dont like to serve the NS, all in all i would say it's a good 2 years for me, but i definitely wouldnt want to do it for life. This 2 years really pushed me out of a little square of my mind, that now i really love the life as a civilian, and i'd definitely cherished every single moments outside of army.

i have know how to befriend and turn crazy with friends in the army. Sometime i am jsut simply alone in a whole chunk of rubbish and i've to face them alone. Time is so important, i really have little time, little personal time, yet my time in the army seemed to be in the control of others ... i just simply felt like a singaporean with all accessities landed up in a rural village of africa. In 8 months time when i am back to my metropolitan life, i would definitely cherished every single monday to friday that i will have, where i have control over my own time. And i will definitely miss the guys that shared the same problem as me in Mandai, the sergeants!

So now i am waiting for 3 more exercises in Singapore, and after that to taiwan. When back to singapore, i will go through what i've been through in SISPEC, Helicopter opereations, and watermanship operation in Yishun and Sembawang areas and finally tank operation. Soon, in a flash of light, it's national day, and i believe this national day will be the one that i enjoy the most. Because gonna ORD !!~~~~~~

Enemy

2007-01-07T00:29:00.000+08:00

6th January 2007
Saturday

Last week, and the week before were all exercises in extreme heavy rain. The ground seemed so close to my face. Infantry. All about sticking my whole body into the ground!

The week before on the Thursday was Mandai night walk. We walk all the way from upper pierce reservoir through vegetation into mandai and back to camp from the backyard. Water level hit my waist, flooded. Some of my even friends claimed of seeing the “unseened”. As such, I got a flu, followed by fever. Thanks God that I am somewhere there, fever didn’t go too bad, I am still able to walk. Only for one day I was in terrible sickness. =)

Now that I am in the pink of health, I must really cherish! Drink plenty of water and eat plenty of fruits.

What happen last week? I was deployed as enemy once again. The whole 84mmRR guys usually will end up as enemies, for the soldiers to fight. This is my second time as enemies. This time round, I made sure my obstacles are all well set up. And the various route all well recognized. Gonna make life tough for them!! Kekekeeeeee ….

It was really exciting. Especially the night attack. My friends and I were like ghosts moving about. We managed to work out our plan, attacking them from the back. One point of time where Malek, Aslan and me were just simply lying flat on the ground and no one spotted us … that was thrilling!

Another interesting thing was Alvin. I deploy him as the second layer of enemy, but instead of being alert, he was there sawing the tree with his jack-knife! I was quite unhappy in my heart, instead of being alert he was playing around? Haha … so to get even, I told him not to fool around in the forest, there’re unseen “things”, especially trees, trees are very significant!! And bla bla bla … Hehee … think that day I was really a good story teller that Alvin actually believe what I’ve said! I was really worried that the half-sawed tree might fall and hit someone, so I told him to finished the whole tree, and say sorry to the tree after that. Well, fearing of being persuaded by the “tree spirit”, he quickly did as I said. Kekeee …

Next week will be going Pulau Tekong malay village for a week. I am sure down there would have more interesting things happening.

Last Day of 2006

2007-01-02T00:19:00.000+08:00

31 dec 06

Of all the days ...
i actually got a fever today !!!
That's how my new year goes ....
Probably because of chocalates during christmas + rainy days exercises ?

=x

hi 2007!

National Service

2006-12-25T22:40:00.000+08:00

25 Dec 2006
Christmas daY

it's so difference.
1 year ago and now, everything feel so different. As i was tidying up my drawer, i saw some notes, cards, and gifts given by my friends during the day i was enlisted. i recalled the day my dialect friends celebrated e farewell at Lerk Thai... 7 sep was my first day in the army, 6 and 5sep were memorable days ... although it's just one year, but i felt that it's been really far ... very far... many things had happen, compared to the 3 years days in Poly.

Seemed like my thinkings have changed too ... there're changes. My perspective and everythings. It kinda takes sometime to explain ... but all in all, God is still e same! An unfortunate one is that, some of my friends change too. Changes of my friends = either beautiful or ugly.

Nonmatter what, i am still the zhenghong i was but maybe more mature? heez ...
days and days i am starting to learn more about myself and God. i know what i want and what i do not need. My dream and vision still stay. My everyday spiritual kinda warefare are still on ...
i gotta understand and adapt to those changes which seemed to intertwined into my walks. Living in the past only bring me memory but not my life. My life is in the faith of the future which i am seeing each day, even now as i'm writing these. In my new friends, Jonathan, Kok heng, in the latest happenings, and the latest challenges and in the most recent realisation of myself whether good or bad...

New people are coming into my life ...
Buck up ..

Malek

2006-12-23T01:15:00.000+08:00

23 December on the year 2006
0037 in the morning …

So what’d happened in the last 1 week? Things were gReaT! God once again present in my daily life. Remember days ago I was saying I felt pretty let down for my soldier Malek? Feeling alittle bad about it and wanting to express my appreciation for Malek’s great attitude? I actually went to have a talk with him telling him what I really felt about him, giving him a certain confirmation about his great work. Recently he was just feeling alittle lousy about himself though he was not at all … lousy. He is the best.

Praised the Lord God did his part. Just recently, Malek was recognized by the company and was given the title of ‘Best Soldier of the Month Dec’! Hallelujah! Look at the great miracle that He has done! Malek was recognized, got a long weekend to enjoy … I felt delighted seeing my hardworking friend’s smile.

My 84mm guys were great. Our bond seemed to grow stronger. We’re more like friends rather than just sergeant and man. Just yesterday during a mock up test for the weaponery knowledge, Charlie once again was noted the best among the battalion! I simply felt honorable. What I really hope for now is that we can be selected to go Thailand for training … because we’ll be away from the poor management camp and be treated like a guest in Thailand. We are basically on our own!! We can do whatever we feel best for us! Heez heez …

I felt utterly disgrace by the fact that 70% of the current spec from my batch cannot be compared to the man standard of a soldier behavior. Or I would say, the standard of a warrior. Back in SISPEC, we were thought and mould to be a strong warrior, a sergeant, one that can go the extra mile and have the extra responsibility but sad to say, only a handful managed to have that kind of spirit. Is it that they’re discouraged by the poor management of the camp? Or is it that they’re really that slack? I was pretty hit down by all these, first thing was the great August disappointment, and secondly was the great realization of the battalion poor management and third was the great discovery of a non-warrior warriors… I was pretty discouraged, and don’t seemed to feel the touch of the fighting spirit that I once met. Until … …

Until I see Malek, Aslan and the rest.
Now I can imagine how’s thing gonna be like in Taiwan. My comrade sergeants might not be that eager as me, but I feel that they definitely have something good in them which I should open my eye to see and trigger them to draw up that part of them and demonstrate out! Rather than dwelling in the ugly side of them and feeling like a volcano.

I need God’s wisdom. His coolness and his calmness … let my mind runs smooth and steady, help me to trigger the beauty of my fellow comrades.

Alright … tomorrow is Christmas svc in church. I invited my good NS-Christian friend Jonathan and humble non-believer Cheng yi. They were there back in sispec in Alpha till 1 SIR, my old old friends. I also invited very helpful Ah Pu from my platoon. I hope the crappy K9 ZhengGuan would also come, probably with his friends too? Heeheez … What I really hope most is that they’ll receive salvation into their life. Maybe help-out in the dialect church too?

So friends, here’s all I gotta report for this week. Hope you’ll keep my fellow friends in STRONG prayer! Nightz. =)

Great Deals!

2006-12-18T09:50:00.000+08:00

18 dec 2006
Cool Monday

Just came back from MAndai Camp. Yesterday my friend Glenn was doing guard duty. He was the "sway" one ... gotta lots of extra duties. Haha ... Friday then saturday and eventually sunday too.

He's attached and wanted to go out with his girlfriend on sunday after 3 weeks of not seeing her. Everyone seemed to be busy ... i'm offered with a deal by my superior, for covering half of Glenn duty in exchange of 1 day off, which is today!! Think about it, not bad ... hmm .... so i agree to it !!

Praised the lOrD!
Today's off actually saved me from a last minutes thingy which required all in-camp personnels to help out those who required to reshoot... what a great deal !! haha ....~~~
Okay .. gotta rest. take care ~

DHL

2006-12-16T22:57:00.000+08:00

Saturday 16 dec 2006

Dialect church christmas svc. Help out today ...
Once again i felt like DHL ... rushing for the best, providing the best svc for the folks ...sense of sactisfaction ...
Everyone was great ... especially Ah Hua .. still owe him a photo of his ... heez ...
He's still the same, full of storys to tell
I went to sunlove home and also evergreen home today ... felt that evergreen home got a very special atmosphere ... =) Elderly there were very kind ... also the Philipino Helpers ...

These days i feel like i have let down malek alot. Malek is my best soldier, the one that i appreciate the most, the one who'll go all the way with me! In Jurong island i didn attached him to me or habib, (we're e most 'fun!' sergeants in Charlie, hahas) ... and the recent live firing he was attached to other group ... and today he has to do guard duty after more than 24 hours of live shoots ... non-wonder he's so moody... the reason why i dont wanna change his guard duty is so that next week he could enjoy his Christmas to the max... and the following weekend his new year to the maX ... Any way ... thou he's a muslim, but pray that he'll feel appreaciated.

okay ... Christmas gotta invite a friend Tay Kok Heng ... pray that he'll not backup ~~~

i love dialect. =)
i love God!

TuesdaY

2006-12-14T15:44:00.000+08:00

12 december year 06.

Reaching the end of year 2006. This is probably the only year where I am fully spent in the army. 2005 I was enlisted in September and 2007 I will be finishing my NS duty in September. Hopefully I’ll be stronger mentally after these 2 years of working with different kind of people.

Today I went to Orchard to buy 2 remote helicopters for my nephew, Jun Yong and Jun Xiang. Next things I knew, they’ve got the same helicopters already. =( chilled!! After that, went to have Mcdonald with them and uncle Ho. Jun Xiang ‘s very cute, very adorable.

After the meal, I head to Marsiling to do visitation with Maria, at an old folks’ home – SunLove. Hee … back to ministry serving? It’s been really awhile since I last served in the ministry. I took a little short break from serving. Supposed to plan till next year May, but I cant help, and feel that I should served whenever I can! This whole things are like a bicycle chain when I’m cycling, it gotta be constantly moving, then the bicycle will move! I am currently feeling the consequence of this whole thing. Nevermind if you don’t understand. =)

Next year! I pray that it’ll be a smooth journey and of course a time where I start preparing for my after NS. The little vision that I have in my heart, I pray that it’ll be alive and come stronger and clearer than ever. In a twilight, my NS period will be over, and I am back to civilian life.

Just afew more jungles to go …

A gentle reminders when I was in a quiet time a few days ago. I felt a strong feeling to constantly reflect regarding

- am I willing to sacrifices my times when I really need to, for good
- am I willing to pray even at time when I don’t feel a need to pray, when I’m yawning…
- did I write down my plans?

I want to draw my faith 100% from God, and not half-half from another human being.
I want to be a great communicator. All kind of language that I know of…
I want to take personal things easy … chilled …^_-

That’s me!

Ending of 06

2006-12-02T08:54:00.000+08:00

2 December in the beautiful year of 2006
Saturday
Cloudy morning

Supposed to be swimming now, planned to waiting for this morning swim under the sunny sun but unfortunately to my unbelief, it’s a very cloudy morning. I’ve not touch the water for say 3 or 4 weeks already. It’s my hobby, swimming. I love best when I am totally sub-merge inside the water, as long as possible. For the last 3 to 4 weeks, I have been seeing trees after trees and muds after muds, not a single clear refreshing water. So hopefully later part of the day, the Saturday sun will be out!

Hmm … tomorrow I’ll be going back to Jurong Island again, and last till Tuesday. Then my company will officially hand over duty to Bravo. And there, I clean off from alert red duty, from protection of installation duty. Totally free and enjoying 1 weeks holidays without much worries. =D

After that, it’ll be probably January time, where everyone is back to forest again. Preparing for the ATEC in Taiwan, and after Taiwan,

it’s another Chapter anticipating… …

My Idea of e Building Fund ll

2006-11-25T20:56:00.000+08:00

25 November 2006
Saturday

I like this whole thing about market place. Although it’s been like 3 weeks since I last attend a service due to my weekend training in the army, these whole things about market place still linger around my heart and my mind. Looking at my new cell group members one after one, although I hardly joined them for cell group since the day I enlisted, but they’re like my constant aspirers. They are banker or stock security, teacher or whatever you can name it. They’re just people from the market place! Some of them are so rich beyond my imagination. The cell group seemed to be in the same flow as the church vision. Some of the younger one though not rich yet, I say, yet. But they’re also my aspirer, seeing the way they react to circumstances and their kinda Jesus like attitude, I know they’re gonna prosper. It’s just a matter of time.

Every weekend, I look forward to joining them in the Saturday service. But everytime I just couldn’t make it on time. But one Saturday night and a little fellowship with them after service on an alternate basic, keep me alive! Yeah, I really yearned to join them in the fri cell too, so far I have not attended once since sispec time.
:(

Anyway, pastor always say, mixed around with the eagles if ya wanna sowed like one.
Just simply being in these company presence and listening to their conversation, seemed to always lit up that particular hope and dream that I have in my heart.

Now the church is talking about building fund for a state of the art structure. Not just a structure but one magnetic core in the center of the earth that’ll make an impact and a difference! It’s more that just the physical form of gravity that’s already presence. It’s a kind of gravity that holds everything to its original intention and purpose. That’s the kind of picture that I’ve got in my mind. I want to be involved in this building project. I guess my little contribution will be something in this whole construction!

Construction = to create.

Jurong Island

2006-11-25T20:20:00.000+08:00

25 Nov 2006
Saturday

Today I didn’t managed to make it to the service on time, so I guess I will go tomorrow instead. It’s not good to be late for an appointment, especially an appointment that’s divine. Haha … So what’s been in the last 1 week? My battalion just took over 6SIR for the protection of Jurong Island. Finally I am able to see the burning furnace which I have been seeing when I was in SISPEC time, it was so near and I could hear and feel the heat of the flame! It was very contagious. The whole Jurong Island Highway was literally lit up by the burning flame.

Okay, so I was holding on a rifle standing at the check point for 12 hours. Of course that included an hour break for every hour duty. I got to stare and be vigilant at all time. It was a totally new experience for me. Totally different from conventional warfare which I was trained from. My boots need to be kiwi shined, my shirt need to be smart fit, I gotta look alert. Haha … ready to aim at any time. What really caught me was the night 12 hour duty. Basically there was hardly any vehicle in the night and some of the police actually fallen asleep. But we couldn’t though we’re real tired! I can actually hear the whisper of winds, it was that quiet. I had a good time praying, to keep myself awake. It was difference.

So Monday and Tuesday I did morning duty at the check point, Wednesday rest in Jurong Island, Thursday night I did a night duty at check point.

Friday night was trilling. It was night duty again. But this time round I’m given the task of patrolling in the central sector of the island, with a driver and a car plus 2 machine gunners. We petrol through the Jurong Highway, was given a handheld pocket PC with GPS enabled, I explored the whole GPS system and the whole jurong highway, certain trills happened which I wished to keep it a secret. One thing I wanna highlight, GPS is GREAT !!! With a GPS in hand, you’ll never lost your way!

Okay, soon December gonna enter my room and finally year 2007, where I gonna ORD soon … in 9 months time. Heehee …

Thanks God.

.A.S.O.N.

2006-11-18T23:26:00.000+08:00

18 Nov 2006
Saturday

Hi folks, it’s really been a long while since I last entry. It began probably since the month of august? August wasn’t a really good month for me I would say. Followed by September and then finally October where things seemed to settle a little. And now I’m on the ride of November where things seemed so tough and challenged for me. Much much more…

I’ve a lot of bad and good things to share, things that evolved around my entire life especially the things of God. I was thinking of really giving up my blogs. But now I thought a little, no way. The blog remind me of who I am and who was doing those things with me. It acts as a kind of crystal ball with electrifying power that able me to goes back in time and recapped back those moment of God’s tangible touches.

Max Lucado’s book seemed to have left my hands and my eye for sometime. I was very devastated. The month of August hit me badly. All the disappointments just seemed to shoot over to my directions in a short period. I was tested and tested badly in my army camp. I was carrying the appointments of many importance roles, I was given the task of many important appointments. I was first hand in many things. Personal life, I was taken aback by some facts which I found courage to ask. Facing some difficult superior and discovering the bastard personality of my friend, I felt so alone. 2 closest sergeants that work with me, one is hard-working but not alert, no sense of urgency, the other is alert but selfish and lazy. At the start I was quitta angry, but I think I got to accept the fact that at least he is hardworking, as for the other one, I just wouldn’t know what to do.

I mean as a commander, why wouldn’t they have a sense of ownership? A sense of initiative? Why couldn’t they lead by example? Produce work and attitude of a high standard? It’s not difficult at all, just be honest and do not the short cuts. Just be daring, you’re a commander, the live of your soldiers are in your hand. Why do they walk and fall in with the soldiers, I am always the one counting and making sure no one was lost. I am always the one shouting and making sure announcements were past down properly. Yes, one is hardworking, he is willing but he is not daring to try, and to meet a high standard, he like to copromise, which indirectly actually affected many many things. The other one is a bastard.

Sometime I am really tired. God.

Most of the new sergeants and officers just want the quickly life out. They go for the short cuts and the benefit of finishing things fast but without making any changes. Compromise, heck care.

I am so tired that I feel I am always the extra one. Thanks God that I found 1 or 2 more fellows like me. Sometime they just want to quit and flow with the rest, but what we have is the reason why we’re difference! I told one of the chaps. Sometime how I wished we could be in the same company same platoon, helping out each other.

We were the result of very delicious and fresh chicken fillet being sandwiched!

Today in the bus I reached out to the book written by Max Lucado - Travelling Light. Recently just ended many many tough exercises. Finally I get to read the book again. He mentioned the word “dis”, this 3 letter changes appointment to disappointment, engage to disengage, and many more.

Paul was definitely the most disappointed when he thought he was going Spain but ended up in prison. Jesus was definitely disappointed when he realized that Judas would betrayed him. I am of course disappointed when I realized my friend would leave me behind when I need his help, my soldiers and superior doesn’t understand my intention and my situation, when I realized I’ve got the wrong idea all these while. When I realized my expensive piano couldn’t be fixed. When I realized I was repeating the same mistake again and again, without much changes.

The book quoted - So, we like the sheep, get wounded. And we, like the sheep, have a shepherd. Remember the words we read? “We belong to him, we are his people, the sheep he tends” (Ps. 100:3) He will do for you what the shepherd does for the sheep. He will tend to you. “I am the good shepherd,” Jesus announces. “The good shepherd gives his life for the sheep” (John 10:11) Jesus never give up on me and you at all. I believe as long as I never give up on Him either.

His presence lingered around.

Okay, now after exercise bulldog, exercise Leopard 2, battalion live firing and alert red. I know I am doing the extra because I carry the name of Jesus. It’s for Lord. Yeah, definitely I should give up on some of the disappointments, but not all, I shouldn’t give up on the promises that I made to myself and to the lord. Never give up on correcting my bad mistakes and so on. Never give up on doing my best in whatever assignments assigned to me.

Trust is very important. It’s just like if you’re starting a business, trust is where your business start. People trust me with their works only if you handle theirs like yours.

I’m very happy that the new brigade CO recognized and appreciated what I carry myself out. Especially the word where he said during exercise bulldog, “you seemed to have a kind of Spirit.” And where my friends trust me in doing things for them, there are still far better personalities to pick up from. This is a short break to tell me that I am on the path. So bro, don’t be taken aback and stop what you’ve been doing just because of certain disappointments.

Yes, the whole camp is a disappointment, especially the management. But the whole camp is in the arm of God, the whole embrace of God is not a disappointment!
Thank you God for your understandings and your forgiveness to me.

Yeap, I’ll still pen down what I wanted to remember in this blog.

Sandwiched Prt 2

2006-09-16T23:22:00.000+08:00

SANDWICHED PART 2

Hi! I’m back. Just went to my church service. Indeed it was good. It kind of answered me of my prayers. Conflict Management, yeah, in the end, it’s just all about me and God. I believe that the situations I am currently facing at are but just challenges plan by Him, our LoRD. Today, I lift up the whole problem into the hand of LorD during prayers in the service. I know things gonna change in a matter of time. I do not have to worry or hold any grudges. Just do the right things I am supposed to do, make the right decisions at the right time. Forget about the disappointments and prepared for the coming blessings.

All of a sudden, 2 brothers came to me to share their problem in BGR. Why is it me? I told them what I personally felt a few weeks ago, hopefully it do help. Bless them LorD.

Sandwiched. I do not want to be sandwiched, I want to be the mouth who taste the delicious sandwiches. I want to overcome the giants instead of being the grasshopper, I want you to be with me, LorD. Caused me to be sensitive to ya power, the Holy Ghost.
I don’t wanna be eaten up by my colleges who thought that I am too good, I want to be strong. Guide me LoRD. Thanks for the good friends that you have send to support me. Halleilujah! Help me to be firmed, strong, decisive and wise. Help me to forget all the unhappy encounters. Help me to respond to situation as how you would respond. Thank you LorD!

KeiTH

Inherent meaning: From the place of battle
Spiritual Connotation: Brave
Gal 5:25
If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.

SandWiched

2006-09-16T13:45:00.000+08:00

16 September 2006
Saturday

Hi, how’re you? These days have been a little tone down, not much of exercises in the forests, but more of admin in camp. Specialists in 1SIR are indeed suffered in silent. What do I mean? We have been the one doing the major shits, and also the one carrying the major blames, and the one being hurt the most. Both mentally and physically, but the superiors are the one who take the praises. My fellow specialist friends are in very low morale, 2 of them have already injured themselves. Not to mention, I’m a little affected too. We’re like being sandwiched between 2 kinds of breads, the man and the officers. And all these no one would understand except the fellow specialists and our master sergeant.

Take me for an example, some of my platoon soldiers are tricky and even possessed the worse attitudes I have ever seemed throughout my life till now. These people have got tattoo all over and walk like a fighter yet they’re always finding excuses and trying to stir up conflicts just to escape from exercises.

My upper superiors don’t know the whole pictures as they’re not as close to them as us, and always ended up in the wrong conclusion and decision. And who are the one whom the faults will ultimately goes to? The specialists.

Thanks God for the other half of my soldiers. They’re the 84mm soldiers. They’re the most willing, most determine, most positive man of the man. Yet in them there are also some problems, a few of them are suffering from serious injuries due to training.

Specialist. God! Help me.

To be continue tonightz.

A New Sound

2006-09-04T16:59:00.000+08:00

THANK YOU

Thank You for the promises You made

For the gift of life You gave

Always i will song Your praise

Thank You for the chance to live again

for Your grace that never ends

Always i will sing Your praise

Hallelujah

My beloved King

To You i sing

Hallelujah song (x4)

You mean everything to me

You're all thyis world will never be

Your name reigns in my heart

You;re all that i depend on

Centuar

2006-09-04T16:57:00.000+08:00

September 4
Beautiful year of 2006
4 pm in the afternoon

The moon was very bright. My surrounding was very quiet. Everyone was asleep. As I listen, I can only hear the slight howling of the wind and the little movement of the leaves and branches. As I look at my watch, I am only left with 1 hour to sleep. How can I sleep? I’m afraid if I sleep, I might not be able to wake up on time, and I probably will fail the mission. Yeap, the time now is 2300 on Tuesday 29th Aug 2006. 12 am sharp is the movement out time from my current hide out area. From Monday till this time I have only rested for 3 hours and 30 minutes. I’ve been attending operations orders and doing recca to deploy my 4 anti-armor threat weapons.

Operations orders and move out plans can change as far as in the last second. I’m getting a little taste now. Taste of 1SIR outfield. Indeed, their exercises are Spiritually, mentally and physically demanding. It was crazy if you were to ask for my personal thoughts. Looking at the sky, praying to keep myself recharged for next day. The particular most shining star was there again. God provide us with strength. I was half praying, half asleep actually, thought sitting on that little rock. Let me introduce, this is a particular battalion exercise – exercise centaur.

Next thing I know, my watch rings. It’s time. I get the soldiers to wake up, get their weapons, and we link up with the main HQ. And from there, we proceed till next day 0600 am. Marching and hiding throughout. The 84mmRR are really the best soldiers of the best. Carrying the heavy weapon for me, they didn’t complain a single word. They go all the way. Even as I see their face turns pale. They keep in silent. They really live up till their standard. This is the night I saw the most mist, the most beautiful moon and brightest star and the strongest men. Looking at my watch, it’s 30 Aug.

Attack commenced at 0700 hours. My task was to block and take down 2 vehicles. We managed to take down one, by Habib’s team. After the whole things, it was 0900 hours. We have already link up with Charlie Coy at a resting point. The whole mission had officially ended.

Thinking of taking a rest, but just after a few slip of water, the next mission came in. I was call for the next operations orders at 0930. What’s this? This reminded me of the time in Mandai searching for a controlled item. There’s no mercy for rest. Next things I know, 2nd mission was activated at 1030 on Wednesday morning. Everyone was dead tired. No doubt, but me too!

Hiding from 1500 all the way till 2300 then we spotted the enemies. They were coming up to our directions. Despites two 84mm rounds being fired off, yet enemies still won’t die, because this exercise is a simulated one, only flashes, lights, and thunder sound, but doesn’t inflict injuries at all. So they’re actually kind of cheating. I then threw a smoke grenade into the vegetations where they’re coming from and withdraw. The enemies were totally smoke-out inside the vegetation and coughing badly, other friendly forces near by were giggling. The whole situation brought laughter to the already shagged out soldiers.

By the time I reached back Mandai Camp, it was Friday morning 0300 hours. Saturday and Sunday is then another exercise. Exercises in build-up areas and that’s how this tiring and demanding week was spent.
=,(

Hi ...

2006-08-28T11:22:00.000+08:00

Hi !

Readers. It's once again monday. The first working day of a working week. Whatever bygones are bygones. Do not let yesterday's success or dissapointments affect you, do not worry about tomorrow's problem either. Care what you have right now, today!

thinking about the coming days. It's gonna be something i am gonna open my eye wider still! Even wider. Why? Because they're amazing! The amazing amazement amaze of an amazeous GoD.

My heart gonna speak to my soul, "why! PraiSe e LorD" ... nothing to be afraid of. Nothing to be sad about. Nothing to worry abt. Cant wait for the next taiwan trip. You'll be going or so call "chiong!" all e way to the highest peak of the knoll, probably a normal metropolistic building of 40 storey hight knoll. and then right there, at there, in the night, you'll be glazing at the beautiful sky lit up by STARS. It's all black, only stars! Below you are valleys of mists! Beautiful. This time round, i will definitely tagged along my digital camera to take some pictures.

Couldn't forget, the night city view, the cold night weather, the breeze, all up on the so-call mini mountain. Or perhaps a gargantuan knoll. And there, you pray. In the rural area of taiwan. The experience is . (beyond words can explain)

okay! Dear friends, have a pleasant day!

Dr|nK

2006-08-27T20:02:00.000+08:00

I’m leaving e desert
I’m tired of e heat
I’m over e dryness
I need to be freed

I’ve seen an ocean
I’ve felt the breeze
I’ve found it in Jesus
It’s a place I can drink

A place of Your freedom
A place I can rest
A place where e river flows
A place where Your mercy goes
A place without anguish
A place I can drink
A place I can drink
A place I can drink

I drink of the water
I drink of the wine
I drink of His presence
I leave e dryness behind
I come near to Jesus
To let Him touch me again
I drink of His Spirit
Let it never end

Army Half Marathon

2006-08-27T19:30:00.000+08:00

27 Aug Sunday.
In e year of 2006
Where I am coming to e end of first year of army.

I’ve got a lot to share. A lots of encounters and stories to tell, ups and downs, happy moments, dissapointed moments. I am one who try not to think about sad experiences although many a time they just couldn’t get out of my little brain. Nevermind. =). Thinking about the wonderful things God have done, I feel simply happy. As you’ve read my blog (if u’re constantly keeping track of my issues), recently I was in a very downy mood, my mind and heart seemed to have locked due to certain personal issues.

Today, I went for 21 km half marathon. First time in my life I ran a marathon. Looking at the distance and adding of my current mood, I have no intention, no morale to put in my most effort. Just simply wish to run slowly enjoying the beautiful scenery created by God. Wake up 0330 in the morning, move out at 0400, and marathon began at 0545. Upon reaching Padang, the crowds were like armies of ants! Everyone was so filled with strong sense of enthusiasm! I can’t help but to be partly influenced! “Beeeeeeeeeeep~~~~~!” The race began. Start off with slow relax run. As I run, as my leg moved, as my heart jumped, all in the environment of 0545 am, breathing in that particular air. It was very familiar ! That was what I used to do!! Jogging in the morning to my quiet place to seek GOD! Dwell in His peaceful presence. Tell Him all that I wouldn’t dare to tell others. Suddenly I felt my mind filled with many good things and conversations I have with Him over at the Seletar Reservoir. I felt a sudden anguish, and a sudden urge, I just want to run! RUN! RUN! RUN! As fast as I could! I just want to run away from all, to GoD! Who was and who is the only one who knows how I felt. My friends are catching up, I don’t care. I only recognized that morning breeze, and the morning voices of GoD.

NS is kind of tough, as in tough not of physical, but of the other realm.

Just bought the album GREAT IS OUR GOD. One particular song DRINK sound nice. The next entry is its lyrics.

Little Haijie N Jun Xiang

2006-08-27T12:25:00.000+08:00

Mother BirthDay

2006-08-27T12:03:00.000+08:00

My mum and uncle Ho.

Continue ...

2006-08-26T09:57:00.000+08:00

26 Aug in the year 2006
time is 9 hour 48 mins in the clear sky
It’s a SATURDAY !

Okay … now I’ll continue my story. So … I was talking about 2SIB CO, who’s so-call quite a big shot in Mandai Hill Camp. It all happen on Tuesday where I was asked to give a presentation on how I deployed my 4 “crazy” 84mm RR at New Theo Housing Estate, and how I take into consideration of my soldiers safety. Well, I just be myself, and give the presentation as I would have given to a friend. I answered CO’s question without fear, but definitely nervous. I talk to him like I would have talk to a good friend. All kind of high ranking officers were around, listening and looking at me. It soon ended up with loud laughters among the crowd, but these are different from BMT, these are the laughter of agreements, laughter of appreciation where before me, climate was very very very tensed. Everyone seemed to be very very very afraid of him. Thanks God for God.
It all ended up with loud applauses and as I went back to my seat, people around me were saying “good job, up lar! You’re doing good etc”. Truly, this is not my work at all. I understand myself very well. This is the work of a Holy Spirit! 2nd time I am experiencing these. First time was in SIW where I gotta give a speech for the end of course ceremony, and the same compliments were received after my speech when I get back to my seat. One thing that really caught my attention was when a friend told me that, “Siah! Your English up lar ~~~” … wow ~~~!! That left me with a sweet unforgettable mark in my heart. First time in my life somebody praised me of my English as I was really really really superb really BAD in languages, both English and Chinese.

Next, get to Wednesday. Wednesday afternoon 23 Aug, as my friend asked another friend some weapon facts about the 84, I actually FORGOTTENED! So I quickly referred to my handbook and look through simply out of curious conscious only.

Then in the afternoon, there’s a 1SIRCO meeting for all high ranking experienced officers and sergeants. NSF like us can forget about it. But due to the fact that many of them were on leave that day, I was asked to tag along too, just to fill up the seat. I felt honored. I then took with me a heart of seeing the world outside, expecting just to seat in one corner and see how these old men and old lady of the round table make decisions for the battalion. Truly, it was quite boring, infact very boring. I know nutz. What the heck these oldies are talking. Yet I dare not sleep, though very sleepy, it’s very rude.

“Who’s this chap over here?” out of a sudden, the CO asked. “die liao” I thought to myself. I introduce myself to the CO of 1SIR. Immediately after that, he throw me a question about the 84 !! I was stunted one more time, I thought awhile, “HEY! Isn’t that the same question my friend was asked in the afternoon! ” WOW !! PRAISED e LOrD manz !!! So I answered with confidence. Behind my head was sweating like mad, but as I look around the room, everyone was clapping and nodding their head as they look over to my direction. =)
So look! In 2 days, there’s a deep impression now, in the whole camp, especially 1SIR, a good one. In BMT which also took 2 days, but a bad impression. Things in army happen in 24 hours. Haha ~~~!!

Now everyone have high expectations of me. I confessed I had some fear now. But fear is not of God. Pls keep me in prayer. I know I fear of not living up to their expectations, which is not right. I should live up to God’s expectation. And the fear of God instead of the fear right now !!!

Hmm … in a few hours time, I’ll be heading to Boon Lay MRT Control.
Good day !

*Look!

2006-08-23T21:41:00.000+08:00

23 Aug 2006
Wednesday

Right now inside the Mandai Hill Camp specialist Mess, using the computer. Mg Commander Li Z.H is seating beside me, seriously 100% fit into the comics screen of the PHILLIPS box. Recently get to know this guy more, thanks God for the companions of good friends.

The last few days wasnt easy. i was quite dissapointed and couldnt really get over certain 1 fact which i finally know about last wednesday. 2 friends have been encouraging me in camp. As i think about it every night, i think i should let these incidence passes by. Maybe i am one who easily get the wrong picture. Probably i am also emotional. Any way, at least i know where i stand and where i am. Maybe you might be thinking what the heck i'm trying to say, heez, maybe some entries later i will blog a better one.

Okay, i gotta be back to business. God is really good. i am seeing His power in camp, His love and His miracles. Today is a very special day. Yesterday, i told myself i shouldnt be bothered by those incident, i should buck up! No help at all by thinking about it every single seconds and got bothered abt it. As a PS of HQ-Charlie of 1 SIR, i should shine the glory of God through my actions. I shouldn't be pulling a long face and feeling strengthless. Where is that positive mentality? That "garang" Spirit, the zhenghong i was before wednesday??? The zhenghong who would "chiong" and take tasks seriously??? Where is he? Where's the muscle of Spirit?

I thought i have lost everything. But look! Today the favour of men have spread from Charlie to 1SIRHQ. Yesterday, some miracles falls on me and i got the appreaciation of 2 singapore infantry bridgade CO, ... ... ok shall be continue on saturday, now the mess is closing door liao !

Goodnightz.
A better tomorrow.

*okay.

2006-08-16T17:10:00.000+08:00

16 Aug Wed. 2006. 5:06 pm in the afternoon. Clear all doubts with a very special PFLC. Although alittle sad, but at least i see the whole picture. Now let's move forward. That 's why today a better day, it's always, it's meant to!

Thanks you God.
=0.)

Friends

2006-08-12T21:19:00.000+08:00

My Friends

Yeap … friends. Today I made a point to go out with them. These are the few I’ve known over a few hundreds soldiers I’ve come across since day 1. They never laugh or mock at others. They encouraged, they’re the most understanding of all. Most of them are only able to make it for today, hence we met today. Have a meal of Mcdonald and watched ‘My Superb Ex-girlfriends’. Tom, Ahmad, Jonathan, TaufiQ. Each of them is a good chap in their individual aspect. Jonathan being the only fervent Christian that I’ve known so far in camp, shared with me a lot of God’s blessings and His wonderful works. Ahmad, being a determine friend with his good moral values, trained with me through extra efforts almost every nights in SISPEC, Tom dug the terrible grave hole with me and we have a lot of heart felt chat together. TaufiQ being the laughter by nature looking laugh together whenever we see each other in camp, even now in Charlie too! Let’s forget about the terrible Sgt Z and those guys in BMT who almost got me down the pool of low-esteem … …

Today is a good catch-up days.

*Wondrous

2006-08-12T08:47:00.000+08:00

11 Aug 2006
Friday

Today is a sweet wondrous day, perhaps one of the few i really loved and enjoyed the most. Or i would say the second unforgettable, heart warming day so far. I have no idea how to describe my feeling, it's amazing! It caused my heart to pump 3 beats faster even when i felt a little handicapped about not being able to express out my thoughts. Maybe when the right time arrived, i would be the best describer of such feeling. What feeling? it's for you to guess and for me to keep.

Once again, thanks God for every single things. Ecc mentioned that when you make a promise to God, don't delay in following through for He takes no pleasure in fools who don't keep their vow! Keep all of the promises you make to Him just as He had made to you. To my friends who were in vows and you are reading these, do keep them, try going back to the first time first day of your vow, over there at that place with that incidence with that cry and those tears, where ya're so touched by certain action of God that caused ya to made such decision. Travel back to the time...

When ya're in vow, maybe you have someone in mind? yea ... difficult right? Why not pray for her everyday, because God probably hear ya prayer more than anyone else! And might have put you in priority first for ya prayer and love are genuine. But bear in mind too that she might get attached during ya vow, OucCcccH~~~~~!! It's pain huh ... haha, well, that's what ya gotta take, you should have know abt it on that first day before you made a vow.

Max Lucado picture us as sheep, and when sheep do it their way and wander off their way, he became the number 1 prey for tiger, lion, hunter, and he also couldn't take care of himself, for sheeps are defenseless, they have no fangs or claws, they can't bite you or outrun you. That's why you never see sheep as team mascots. So bear it, accept it, do it God's way. You have a shephard. You have GoD!

To the brothers who are in vow, i'm always keeping you all and the lovely ladies who happen to come into your life, while in e short period of time, in strong, stronger, strongest and very strong prayers!! For strong man like you.

2 Reasons Why I Should go to School

2006-08-03T14:09:00.000+08:00

2 Reasons Why I Should go to School

Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son.

Mother: "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!"
Son: "But why, Mom? I don't want to go."
Mother: "Give me two reasons why you don't want to go."
Son: "Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me also!"
Mother: "Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready."
Son: "Give me two reasons why I should go to school."
Mother: "Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the PRINCIPAL!"

Bad Times Do Come

2006-07-27T21:21:00.000+08:00

Bad Times do Come

27 July 2006
It’s a Thursday !!

Bad times do come. Immediately after I’ve described about God’s wonderful blessings in my life, bad times came. This week hadn’t been smooth for me. Life was a little dry. Many unsmooth occasions occurs. Feeling quite disappointed over these, less motivated.
A voice at least, was still around telling me that these are challenges. Everyone had and will face them.

It’s once again the surface of a deep spiritual warfare coming about soon. It’s a pattern that never seemed to die.

Yesterday, tried to apply 3 days leaves for next week (usually people only applied 2 days), and surprising Master Sergeant Omar approved to my leaves. Today Hafiz tried to do the same things as me, and he was kind of rebuked and rejected. Heeheez …
God is always around.

(1) Tomorrow is another IPPT test, I have overcome my chin-up, now I can do 9. But then, I realized I’ve dropped in my standing board jump, only 216 … Alright, got to be positive manz !! POSITIVE !!!!!!!!
(2) Also realized that I can do well in 10 km run, always thinking I am good in long distance, but then, recently came to 14 km run, I underperformed a little … POSITIVE !!!
(3) Went for my own ATP shoot on Monday and Tuesday for 2 whole day … thought I have passed until the end of the day I was informed of … human error and typing error that my scores was messed up … and I have to come back another day for re-shoot !!!
WHAT’S HAPPENING ?
(4) Realised I got one superb problematic ex-drug and sex abused soldier. But now he got a daughter and he wanted to change yet he is so double minded. How should I react to him ?? I’M STUNTED
(5) Realised one of my good friends was a superb mood swing man. WAS STUNTED 2ND TIME.
(6) Something very meaningful and expensive of mine spoiled for no practical reason.

Many more unsmooth occasions.
This week is sooooooooooooooo heaty !

10 months

2006-07-20T19:26:00.000+08:00

20 July 06
Thursday

… … I know for sure these people cannot be trusted, because their views and opinions changes with the superiors’ praises or criticism. They’ve no originality. =( … …

I’m now a 10 months soldier. So what exactly was happening in the last 10 months? First 3 months BMT in Tekong, Tuarus Company, then approximately 6 months in Alpha Company of Sergeant training school, and now about 1 month in 1SIR. I was never in an officer training school or has any contact with OCS, accept the last ATP shoot with Private Kenny O (attached to OCS Hotel Wing), but I am very satisfied with what I'm given.

3 months in Tekong wasn’t very good to me. I hate it. I have never really mentioned about what I’ve been through then. Was it because I was a Christian or what that somehow I was very ‘attractive’ to the people there. Immediately after cutting Botak, I was ‘swai swai’ picked by sergeant Tay as the platoon IC. (Whoever do well in this role gets a high chance for OCS). In a speedy 1 minutes, my mind runs a lot of thoughts. I wasn’t from any uniform group back in school days, I have no idea of even a drip of malayu commands, but on the other hand, it was a good and rare opportunity, and I must take a risk for a success. I told sergeant Tay I have no experience, he told me it’s ok, he will guide me, it’s not about able to do it or not but to learn and to practice. I thought then this is a good start. A good success always needs a start by courage. The start of everything is always not easy. So with courage I agree to his offer. But guess what, the next 4 days, he went missing !!!

Things move very fast in the army. Selected at 8pm, 10 pm light off (everyone gotta sleep), next day I am the IC. I know NUTS !! Thanks God that one malayu sergeant Shahaizad wrote me a list of commands, but then I got no light and have to secretly study and memorized them in the darkness.

Next day came. It was officially the first day of army for all recruits. ‘te gans’ and all were actually planned ahead on purposes. I don’t know why of these, probably because they’re suffering certain strange mental disorder sadistic syndrome or simply ‘siao!’ Fears were greatly implanted into the new soldiers. Everyone out of fear became selfish. And the most unfortunate of all I would say is the IC, and that’s me. I was like lost! Don’t know what to do, there were many surprises. And one most unforgettable was fire drill. I was blamed by both my instructors and my platoon mates. One in particular sergeant Z especially, was an extreme victim of this sickness, I guess doctor is not a solution for him, but a mental inhabitant center would be a good one. Sergeant Z was aiming at me and marked me since day 1 to last day of BMT. =( . Sergeant Tay went missing, Sergeant Shahaizar was good but timid, sergeant Z was very childish. He makes fun of me, and made me a laughing crown before my platoon. When I tried to be honest and helpful, he implanted an image of stupid before my friends. As such, every single one of my friends got an idea of stupid link to me even until as far as ASLC in SISPEC. In 2 days, because of embarrassment, he had me changed! Just simply because he is the platoon sergeant (PS), and i as IC (PS assistant), having made a lot of mistakes, causing him to loss face, have me changed! I felt deeply like a crown being call to stage to be laughed at and then throw back to the hall.
I was very hurt. Then I was still the point of attention to people around me, they look at how stupid I do things, how clumsy I was, trying to find faults in my life so that they got something to talk about. They simply like to talk and criticize, not knowing how I felt. I was like the hot topic every night to a certain number of people. Sgt Z never gives me 1 opportunity at all. All the while, he has been boasting about himself! And he actually became like the hero of Tuarus Coy.

These goes on every single day in Tekong. I tried to seek companion of God and of my friends over the phone. But it can’t help much as I lost the spirit of courage to tell them my oppressions. Then came faithful Catholic Issac, who always played his small mini guitar in the bunk, which calm down my heart and give me a sense of forgiving, comfort and peace, where I pray. I wanted to tell my friends all these, yet I have no courage, because I dare not anymore, I am enough of being another laughter pill. Very rare tears falls when God touches me on the first night of my cellgroup after first book-out from army!

Soon, all was over and I came to SISPEC ALPHA with a bunch of 80% Tuarus souls. I went through BSLC and ASLC in ALPHA. During BSLC, each time I tried to offer my helps, certain people were just around to reject me saying I will create more troubles. Then I have been telling myself, never to do for them, but always for the intention of goodness, intention Godness.
One day God so well planned that I happened to meet staff Lim Woon Ping. He was like the PS in SISPEC. In SISPEC PS are known as staff. Staff Lim was a real warrior of the SAF. He does the right things at all time, he never despised honesty, yet he encourages. He never takes shortcuts. And he gives opportunities. He gives everyone opportunity and he knows the difference of right and wrong. He is wise. He encouraged me a lot. He provides me the right image I have about the SAF. He gave me an opportunity to be a LPS (Leader Platoon Sergeant) in the miracle hill, Hamburger Hill at Masirling. He is my first learning example in the SAF. I made mistakes, yet he teaches me and let me continue, so that I got space for corrections and put into practices. That’s the purpose of having LPS, Platoon IC etc.!!! Soon, my friends start to have a different pictures of me … the new friends respected me, the old friends were amazed. But I don’t care. Because these people don’t have their own views, they changed their views according to how the superiors praised and mocked, they cannot be trusted at all !! I don’t care about their praise or criticism.

Soon came the rifle missing case. I was attached to many warrant officers and regular commanders at Mandai to find the weapon. I get to know good and bad commanders, but never one as childish as sgt Z. I learnt a lot of things from these people, especially warrant officers. Warrant officers are old officers with a lot of experiences. I was offered to help in many areas, and I am more willing to help and learn. I felt that if someone wanted me to help, it means he trusts me in having the ability to solve his problems! So I take each task as sincere as I can, without much talks. (because they appreciated me)

OC Alpha during BSLC, warrant KarangJibsingsh was another leading good example, plus staff Lee, sgt Wong, sgt Redzwan, and many many more. Soon I entered ASLC and the Turus guys were remaining to 6 or 10 men only. Some of them were good chaps and some were the criticism syndrome guys. I really enjoy my stay there in ALPHA for that’s where I was appreciated and made a lot of real good friends.

Finally I am now in 1SIR. Master Sergeant Omar and a few more certain key leaders had given me good compliments for the things I’ve achieve so far in CHARLIE and SIW (School of Infantry Weapon). All these followed by fellow colleagues’ ones. I know for sure these people cannot be trusted, because their views and opinions changes with the superiors’ praises or criticism. They’ve no originality. =(.
And these are what I went through in 10 months. I believe I’ve more or less been mould in a way or another, discovered my weak and strong points. Also realizing that what I experienced are very practical everywhere, even in my very very own church. Most important of all, I must always look at myself in the mirror telling myself to set a difference from them. Even now as a sergeant too, having direct contact with the men, I set myself by a better and wiser aspects before the personnel !! Because I am different from sgt Z !!!

School of Infantry Weapon

2006-07-17T19:40:00.000+08:00

On the left is Likai, me, warrant Vasamthan and Habib ...

The bottom picture is the crazy 84mm RR and me ...
=)

That's me !!

2006-07-17T19:32:00.000+08:00

Prayerworks

2006-07-17T16:32:00.000+08:00

.I wLL wAit.

( a 6:00 minutes from PrayerWorks )

I will wait on You
Let Your glory fill this temple
Holy Spirit fall
Fill my hearth anew
I will wait on You

My desire is to serve You
Holy Spirit fall
Make me more like You

Holy Spirit strengthen me
Holy Spirit set me free
Holy Spirit clothe me with your power
Holy Spirit be my guide
Holy Spirit with me abide
Holy Spirit anoint me for this hour

Holy Spirit pray for me
Holy Spirit liberty
Holy Spirit touch me with your fire
Holy Spirit counselor
Holy Spirit comforter
Holy Spirit you are my desire

You’re the Oil,
You’re the Water,
You’re the Fire,
You’re the Dove

Holy Spirit come fill me with your love

(RICHARD FOWLER)

SUNDAY

2006-07-16T23:50:00.000+08:00

16 July 06
2332 Hrs
It’s a SUNDAY

Yesterday night was looking ahead at the fireworks. Amazing works of mankind creativitiness.

I found myself a good spot and appreciate the night, the breeze. Many thoughts just came into my mind. Maybe if I’m holding onto some precious, I gotta let off, all for an ultimate nice amazing result of, fireworks! In the practical situation, all the soldiers and I let off our time and pleasures just to make this 10 mins show. And the result was captivating.

For a soul captivating firework up there in the sky, down there in the field were toils of hardships. Smokes were everywhere, images of the men pulling these and that in the days start appearing in an imagination with combination of the smokes. Soon, it was all for the laughter of the kids.

e MeN behind e ShoW

2006-07-16T23:25:00.000+08:00

16 July 2006

There are fireworks set-up inside the Kallang stadium. There are also fireworks set-up outside of the stadium. My company is involved in the ‘sai keng’ of these fireworks outside. All these for the special occasion – NDP (national day parade). We spent 3 days laying the protective layers over the running tracks outside of the stadium which is where some fireworks gonna be set up. All 3 days me and the personnel felt like shit. Anyway, infantry is all about working with the very dust from the ground. 1,2, pull … 1,2, pull … this is how the big mammoths layers of protective sheets are moved.
I am glad and thanks God for the 84 personnel, they’re really the best of the best, especially their attitude. !!

Finally it comes to Saturday. All the primary school kids all over Singapore are coming over to kallang to see, I presumed, the fireworks. The men behind the scene (Charlie), haha, and me do our very best to pull out the last protective sheets … and we waited till 1945 pm … We were very near the fireworks … the kids were counting down inside the stadium, I can hear their shouts, their happiness shoutings. Although felt like shits, whole body wet and smell, but It was all worth while !!

The fireworks did shoot up successfully. One after the other, all went up. On the ground, it was a total mess, superb smoky, but on the sky, it was … magnificent. The fireworks burst just directly above my head. It was colourful, the whole sky was lighted up! Purple rains seemed to have dominated the sky. It seemed to be filled with trillions of bright burning shooting stars !! wow … I was there witnessing the closest ever encounter of a fireworks.

SporTs

2006-07-09T12:31:00.000+08:00

090706
Sunday
1132

Sports. Yeah … I’m the one who don’t like computer games. Probably because my eyes are big, never blink (what my friends had described) heez … I tend to get eye tiredness easily for staring at the screen for simply 30 mins.

Sports. I seemed to have lost the complete interest of grabbing and throwing the big orange = basketball. Soccer, I have never been interested in 20 men chasing after a little white ball for an hour or even more, stupidity factor? I tried to pick up an interest in that, but it just couldn’t work after MANY tries.

Swimming, cycling, skating and running still accelerate in my vain. Looks like I’m interested in sports that cover distances? Nevertheless, I really hope that one day I’ll get interested in soccer. It’s the big thing every ones are talking about everywhere. Give it another try next time. =)

This coming Monday marks the end of my 84mm RR course. Course Commander warrant Vasanthan is a great guy worth respect. I’ve learnt a lot from him. It’s a pity he’s gonna ‘retired’ … what a waste of talent!

Wooooo~~~~~~ Monday afternoon back to Mandai . Once a leopard alWays a leopard – 1 SIR.

ATP

2006-06-25T21:00:00.000+08:00

Don’t allow failure to make you feel like a failure.

25 June 2006
Sunday
2011 Hrs

Right now listening to Salvador … quite a nice band got from attribute. =) Today my mum’s sick, I missed today’s service to take care of her. At the same time, stayed at home to explore some new technology in the world - GPS, and also studied some of previous services sermons. Hope and dream are very important. When the dream come alive again, I felt all the reasons and purposes to carry on my daily life even when met with trials. But sometime I don’t know why, the dreams of mine seemed so hopeless and helpless, I felt meaningless to do anything. =( That’s definitely from the devil.
Last Tuesday and Wednesday, what I did? Probably I would say my first personal achievement in 1 SIR Charlie, or maybe my start off career. Kenny O XX, one of my platoon man, going to ORD on Thursday, yet has not passed his ATP shooting test for even once! He was attached to other units and schools for the test again and again yet had not passed a single one yet. Tuesday I was given the first assignment, guide him in his shooting. So we went to old school, Pasir Labar Camp 300m shooting range, attached to OCS hotel wing, for his ATP. I was beside him from 300m all the way to 50m, from 0730 hrs all the way to 0000 hrs, what exactly was wrong with this guy? Confidence.
Having tattoo all over, yet with no confidence at all. I chat with him for 48 hr, his life, his dreams, his hopes, his problem … I realized is confidence.
There’s a power in imagination. If you can see it, you can have it.
On the second day night shooting, obviously the targets were really hard to catch. I told him to imagine.
23 out of 40 was his score. On the spot, he throw his weapon on the ground and rejoiced!! (ORD liao …)
Haha !! Lieutenant Lei and I were happy for him too, I personally felt a sense of achievement at that moment of time! I’m sure that goes the same to Lieutenant Lei.
God was totally with us throughout. Even at night, when going back to Mandai, a tonner was sent to fetch the 3 of us instead of a rover. Was that to celebrate Kenny’s ORD ? hee …
So next Monday I will be going back to Pasir Labar Camp for course. I myself also faced with failures and challenges. But it’s true that I should never let failures make me like one. I am seeing many good aspects of the people around me and I wanted to be like them ! At the same time I also see a lot of their ugly side and I’ve occasionally played the role of a judger which doesn’t seem good.
Blog is a good channel for me to link up in-camp and out-camp events.

JohN

2006-06-11T00:27:00.000+08:00

John 8:12
Then Jesus spoke to them again, saying, “I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life.”

10th June 2006. Saturday. Last night just book out from Mandai Hill Camp. Last night marks the end of my first 2 weeks in 1 SIR. (First Singapore Infantry Regiment). Everything is going fine in 1 SIR. The battalion is now preparing for the National Day Parade 06. After that, we might be tasked to ensure the security of Changi Airport. And by Nov, we’ll be back to jungle warfare. And probably around March, the battalion will be in Taiwan, some of my friends and I will be in Taiwan again! =) Within a twilight time, I’m on the path to near ORD. heehee …

2nd week I was introduced to the men in my platoon. The 84 commanders, Sinkai, Habib and i have a little games with the men, all guided by our upper studies, so call our mentor. The main purpose of it was to break the ice between the men and us. Ice breaking … heeheez …

The soldiers though from interesting background and with interesting stories and past, but they’re definitely not as bad as what I was thinking. There is something difference in them which some of us don’t have, they’re loyal to their friends, they have a kind of bond, at least for my platoon so far. The whole camp to me is like a little self-correction centre, where boys came in, realized their mistakes, turned over afresh and into responsible and upright, become a true man after NS. And in this 2 years, we play a part for it!

I was brief of our job scope, and we followed the upper studies throughout the week. Our job looks more than just a sergeant, a social worker at times, especially when we even have to do house-visit! Perhaps another term … home visitation …

Yesterday, the whole battalion went jogging at East Coast Park. I took the opportunity to jog with some of the men to know them even more. I noticed I started to use a little hokkien used for the elderlys to encourage them! They’re younger than me, yet they’ve more problems than me.

More things gonna happen. I pray for God’s blessings, guidance and protections.

FIRST AND FOREMOST

2006-06-05T14:30:00.000+08:00

FIRST AND FOREMOST

Hi guys, it've been some time since i blog. Firstly because i've been to taiwan for a training in the beginning of May. And upon back to Singapore, i got only 3 days for passing out from SISPEC and hence the school have been making 'FULL USE' of my 3 days to prepare us for the passing out parade drills. Indeed we did a really great drill that day, especially with the yellow scarf on the neck during that particular day where I pass out from Pasir Laba Camp. My mum and her friend was there to witness my parade, and they brought the wrong camera, they brought my Taiwan camera which had already finished taken. Thanks goodness I’ve taken my memories with my good friends in Taiwan already!

Friends are really hard to find, especially good and trusted friends. In BMTC, I knew Issacc, the guitarist. And in Sispec, I met Win Ho, Jonathan Chan, Admad, Tom, these are friends whom I can trust and whom have given their tolerance to my unreasonable bad temper. Heehee … Throughout my life as a trainee, I felt that NS is no difference from a metropolitan society, fair-weathered friends are common, I think I was a little naïve then thinking I can make lot of friends but when it comes to outfield, where he is shagged, I am shagged too, when everyone is shagged, the only one who come to your aid, are your very trusted friends. In Taiwan, we climbed some hills, I’ve got many adventures to share, but what I really have gotten there is not the fresh air or whatsoever, but the fun I have with detail Alpha 53. Maybe except for one guy, the rest of us really co-operate well in exercise long strike. We took pictures up the mountains, see the eagles, enjoy the far city view from the mountain top, walk pass a villager house and ended up in the back yard of her house after 2 hours, we secretly bought some burgers and cokes and rest inside a plantation near a pig farm, where the SAF-rover (so call police trying to nab us) passes by us without noticing us… it was a good experience during the training. We’re like playing fugitive game with the rover and at the same time finding our check points.

So immediately after graduated from Pasir Laba Camp, all of us thought we’ll have 1 week break, but no, not for my unit ! I was posted to 1 SIR (first Singapore infantry regimental) This particular camp at Mandai had a very rich history down the line of Singapore. Wednesday pass out from PLC, Thursday report to MHC (Mandai Hill Camp), friday 10km run, the following Tuesday IPPT, and Wednesday SOC, then Thursday outfield, and Saturday 24hrs guard duty. ß-- now you get what I mean? Many were quite unhappy and were cursing. As for me I am quite okay with it, firstly because it is near yishun, heehee, secondly because jonathan chan and winho are here too, lastly because I wanted to be in a unit that have a rich history.

Just yesterday, I was posted to Charlie Company of 1SIR under 6th division in Mandai Hill Camp.ß throughout my life all the way till I re-service. I was given the appointment of commander of 84mm Recoiless Rifle, the heaviest rifle in infantry, I have not seen it before, but the good thing is, in the
84 team, there ‘re 6 man and 3 commanders. It is always better than having 1 commander and 6 man. The man here are mostly hokkien soldiers, people of colorful and interesting background! I prefer learning to get along with the man with 2 first, meaning 2 man to 1 commander, which is 84!! Heehee … So in a few more weeks time, I will be back to pasir laba to attend a 4 week course for 84mm RR. Just how is this rifle like ? Just how are the man like ? The other 2 commander Habrib and Likai, and the medic hakin and me! The 4 of us in the same room at 5th floor. Hakin only like frogs, his cupboard was decorated with 2 frogs! That’s all !!!!!! Interesting!

Ok, now that more interesting people are coming into my life. I also almost tripped over and forgotten about God, it’s a great challenge. Thanks to issacc and Jonathan who are both fervent catholic and Christian respectively, whom I was constantly reflected of in the army walk. Thanks also to Warrant Karamjitsingh of his uprightness, staff Lim Woon Pin, Staff Lee, SG Wong, SG Redwan, these are the people that I really learnt from. They are people with strong sense of integrity.

[e] Corporal N' His Pal !

2006-04-29T00:04:00.000+08:00

THE CORPORAL AND HIS PAL
(Cpl. Rodney Breavington and his pals who tried to escape from
Prison were recaptured. The Selarang Barrack Square incident in Sep. 1942. Singapore)

He stood, a dauntless figure
Prepared to meet his fate,
Upon his lips a kindly smile,
One arm about his mate,
His freed hand held a picture
Of the one he loved most dear,
And though the hand was trembling
It was not caused by fear.
No braver man e’er faced his death
Before a firing squad
Than stood that day upon the square
And placed his trust in God.
He drew himself up proudly
And faced the leering foe.
His ragged face grew stern: “I ask
One favor ere I go.
Grant unto me this last request
That’s in your power to give,
For myself I ask no mercy
But let my comrade live.”
Then turning to the guardhouse
Where his sad-faced Colonel stands
A witness to his pending fate
Brought here by Jap command.
He stiffened to attention
His hand swings up on high
To hat brim, in a swift salute.
“I’m ready now to die.”
They murdered him in hatred
Prolonged his tortured end
In spite of all his pleadings
They turned and shot his friend.
They said he was example
Of what they had in store
For others who attempt escape
Whilst Prisoners of War.
Example, yes – of how to die,
And how to meet one’s fate.
Example, true – of selfless love
A man has for his mate.
And when he reaches Heaven’s Gate
The Angels will be nigh,
And welcome to their midst a man
Who knew the way to die.
Whilst here below in letters gold,
The scroll of fame e’er shall
The story tell of how they died,
A Corporal and his Pal.

I really Excited

2006-04-26T23:20:00.000+08:00

i am really excited for taiwan. I can't wait to attend a chinese service in a chinese church with a group of chinese folks. I cant wait to catch that presence ... how is it like ar ???? huh ??? heehee .... i have never travelled so far before. This is my first time. ~~~
i am just excited. Many time i invited my friends to come church, but none responded! zero!! ... all i see are old man and old lady getting touched by God but not a single youth. Hui Ying, my secondary school mate, invited for quite sometime, didn't come at all. Then, i saw her at expo, attending regularly ... heehee ... my cousin weiling, also didnt come for my invitations at all, then she joined FCBC for thai voluntary work!!

And now ram, whom "airplane" me the most. Now suddenly come to CHC because another guy Jonathan who came only once now attending another cellgrp regularly and is a CHANGED young boy! Ram was curious and wanted a blessed future and so he come to CHC again ...

Ricky, the one who sleep besides me in camp, the one who always has little confidence of himself, always want to run away from training, sometime can wake me up in the middle of the night just to tell me the moon is very nice ... -.-!! ... now abt to go taiwan with us !!! Though he turned down my invitation for easter, but i prayed that he'd know God !!

Sometime, ya friends might have rejected ya invitation, but who knows ? you could probably have started the first move of someones salvation.

More Than Life

2006-04-26T22:32:00.000+08:00

So when you make a promise to God, don’t delay in following through for God takes no pleasure in fools. Keep all the promises you make to Him.[Ecc 5:4]

Yeah, I definitely wanted to live a life higher than average. When I make a promise, I try my best to keep it. No one is perfect. And at times I really can’t keep my promise. But still, I’ll make it an effort. I know the importance of saying and promising someone something and keeping it because I was a victim of people who don’t keep promise before! I don’t want the same dissapointment to befall on the people I love and so I am very careful and sensitive to this. I won’t mind making you upset or angry because I can’t promise you to this, I prefer to be frank. I always do my best for what I promised.

I’ve make 2 promises to God for a period of time, 1 for eternal and 1 for a period of 2 yrs. And I must keep it… and that, living a life difference from the average mediocre. In this sacred period of 2 years, I prayed for my love ones very often, wanting the best for them. I wanted something exciting, difference. I want to see miracles in life. One year had already passed, now left with only 1 years! Sometime worries do come, all kind of worries. It is difficult and at time I just feel like giving up, just like marching, I really wanted to say, “God sorry I can’t do it, because I failed to keep my promise again and again’’. That shouldn’t be an excuse, it was from the devil. As long as my togue never say given up, nomatter how many time I failed, as long as I never give up! God will always helped me and you if you are in the same situation as me.

Not just to God but also towards people around us. I can’t promised warrant Lim for getting a silver in my IPPT. I can run, I can do SOC, all with good timing but I just can’t do Chinup. Since the start of ASLC, I’ve been training my chinup almost every single days. I’m aiming for Gold but I couldn’t promise him for a silver. I’m not asking for a chicken rice without chicken, but really I aimed for a Gold and trained almost everyday. I just don’t want to give him an empty promise. I can promised you I’ve trained more than any individual trainee in my platoon. But my improvement was really slow. There’s improvement, but it took people only 1 week and me 10 weeks for the same result of improvement. Definitely I felt very discouraged. Infact I was discouraged many times in army, back in BMTC I was given all kind of really discouraging remarks, until in Sispec then I’m really appreciated. Due to IPPT, I probably lost the opportunity to get into OCS (officer), but does it really matter? Surgeant and officer, does it really matter? Many were discouraged because they couldn’t get into OCS, and started become less coperative and less on the ball! They weren’t as excited as before. Many were on the ball for a common aim, to get into OCS. Alright, me too, but I got a even higher aim, that’s to live up to a life I can be proud of before God, a life that’s above the average mediocre, a life that show the difference. Despite bad IPPT result, I am still as on the ball, my friends said I am ‘garang!~~’. It’s not about ‘garang!~~’, it’s a spirit. Ultimately, it shouldn’t be a rank you’re seeking after, yeah, it’s a recognition, but the cream behind all these is the process you went through. The things that you picked up and the journey of growth while you went through. And what kind of people you really are.

God has indeed been very good to me. I seemed to have found favor in my commanders’ heart. Everytime I was invited for good “lobang!”. And then rewarded with day off. Today I was given another day off. My friends said I was really lucky! No … I wasn’t lucky, I’m blessed. My friends seemed to always quarrelled with each other and complaining here and there, but I see everything seemed ok for me, everything was really fine. Or proabably they’re just choosy? C’mon learnt to appreciate manz! I remembered how I lost my weapon magazine in the Hamburgar Hill, it’s a serious millitary offence for losing a fire arm equipment. I told one instructor and went to look for it myself in e deep forestation, half way through, dark cloud came in and it started to rain, I was really panic. You can understand how I felt that moment? It was like youve killed someone and the police is coming … I was nervous and scared but somehow the power of peace was around. The rain started like 1 mins and stop suddenly and the mag was just infront of me, same colour as the brown leaf !!! All happened within 15 minutes. Look at that ? I also remembered how I found a 3cm fire arm of my friends just before we’re about to leave the place, my friend was as panic as me then. Somehow miracles seemed to happen many time on the hamburgar hill ! On the hill, I was selected for acting LPS (leader platoon surgeant), I was also selected for bleaching commander. On the hill I found a very good shellscreed (tomb hole for hiding) location to dig. Infact that’s only one location, same things happened in other locations!!

Ecc 5:4 helps me to remember what I’ve prayed. =0.) ... with God, plus yr Spiritual battles, it's always More Than Life!

32 km route march

2006-04-26T18:51:00.000+08:00

25 April 2006
Tuesday

Monday night at 2130hr was when one of my biggest giants for the moment started – 32 km route march around Pulau Tekong Island. I remembered back in Pulau Tekong when I just entered NS, 4km was like almost taking my life off, and now is the finale 32km. I wasn’t very good in marching, in-fact I’m really bad at it. My pace is always a step slower than others and the nature of my feet caused a lot of problems. It’s a challenge.

I packed the standard field pack-items, read some verses and did a little prayer like what uncle whye (one of my cellgrp member) recommended and off we set off. The journey took us like 2 hrs from Pasir Laba Camp to Pulau Tekong. This time round, I brought with me extra white and green socks, powder. As usual, I wore a tight, 2 insoles and 2 socks on my feet.

This time round, there was no music and speeches to send us off. Platoon by platoon we set off. The 37 of us set off at 2130 hr sharp, discreetly. The first 12 km was very fast. Extremely fast, it was like brisk walk with heavy field pack. All of us understand that later there will be a river crossing and by then, we’ll all slow down due to tiredness, abrasions, blisters etc. hence we have to speed up in the beginning in order to reach the destination by first light in-order to complete. Definitely there’re some who couldn’t cooperate well and were mumbling throughout! Everyone was extremely energetic and high during the first 4 km. They were singing, laughing and clapping deliriously. The symptoms of 32 km route march soon catch-up with us.

For every 45 minutes march, we’re given 15 minutes to rest. 45 minutes distance was covered in 30 minutes for the first 5 rest points, 4 km for each rest point - 20km in total. The marching time was reduced but the resting time was never increased! Haha … At this point of time, many were having blisters and abrasion, and some were sleepy. I was sleepy too! Some were marching and gradually drifted to a side and almost fall into the vegetation, and some were squatting down on the floor, either to give up or to strife on! One was already giving-up. That’s why I said the Spirit and the Soul have to come into the march because after some distance it’s not about physical anymore!

We reached the 5th rest point. Here’s where we’re handed over to bravo who will assist us in the river crossing. A rope was already tied across to the other bank. The width of the river was approximately 100m. We’re given 15 minutes to set all our equipments secured and ready. Every single one of us was extremely shagged now. The time was approximately 2.30 am Tuesday morning. Holding onto the rope, back facing the water, bag floating on the river and secured to my body and… crossover!

Probably I’m too shagged or it’s the Holy Ghost or probably wandering ghost of Pulau Tekong. I was pulling the rope while crossing in-order to move until I heard someone behind me asking me to stop, and that I can stand up already, I’ve reached the other bank. I thought I was so fast that I’ve hit the previous trainee crossing. I stand up, my feet really touches the river bed, water level till my waist, I quickly grabbed my stuff, turn around, to my shock! , there was no one at all, only a light stick about 50 m more on a tree indicating the far bank marking. I quickly refreshed abit and get to the point asap so that I’ll have enough time to change all the wet stuff. Soon I saw my friends gathering, all were busy packing and deflating their safety float. I’ve no time to think about the previous incidence. I quickly squeezed everything inside my bag and get ready! When I was about to take out my new socks … “2 minutes left” … shouted out from the mouth of Warrant Lim. This is bad! Bad situation with bad time! Vagurities start flying around. And Shittabalakabola bla bla bla start coming out of my mouth. Hahaha … it was initially simply shit! But then I was wrong and I speak in tongues in prayer as I hurried up! Exactly 15 minutes and the whole march began! We’re left with 12 km now. “soldiers! This is the toughest part, 12 km only, finished it, c’mon!!!!” one of the Bravo warrant shouted.

After some time, the whole platoon seemed to have separated into group of 3 to 6 for every 100m apart. The ground was full of big rocks! We were leaping in darkness!! “Light! Anyone got light??” one of my friends asked. I’m the light, haha … I on my superb LED light upon such opportunity. Soon I realized the road was darker and darker, the direction was guided by light stick, I off my LED in order to see the directions. This journey from the river to the 6 rest point which is the parade square seemed to be never ending to me. I was marching alone after some time. Some fall out, some were squatting down, some slow down and some became ‘siao liao’ and dash like a 100m African. I’m alone now. My mind was playing tricks. I admit I’m shagged now. I remembered some Israel pictures and facts that a friend sister Maria had told me during Sunday dialect service.

Woooo … you wouldn’t believe it. The big trees on my sides seemed to have turn into some big ancient pillars. I think I walked through the Golden Gate I saw in a book, then I think I also saw some ancient chapels. I think I’m walking along Via Dolorosa which Maria showed a few of us on Sunday. The scene that she described seemed so solid before my eye, I was like walking on it at night? I started singing Christian songs to keep myself awake and not to give up. I started to meditate on the good things as I walked. I start thinking of the good friends I had in dialect church. I started praying for them. The commandos march 74 km … this is only 32 km …!! The front was darkness, far far away I thought I saw a castle or a building with beam of light, but they were never reached. Some I managed to reach but it was actually a light stick directing me to turn left and right. I was like catching up light stick after light stick and even fire flies! I thought I finally saw a guy marching in-front of me, then I run to him but it was just my shadow! I thought someone giving up and squatting ahead but just a fallen branch. I thought I might have lost my way, but no I’m still following the light stick! So I continue to walk.

Finally I hit the main road!!! I was so happy that I bend down and torched the FLAT road, almost kissing it. What an eye opening journey! Now I felt like I was flying, any slight push over my field pack and I will fall … most probably. I couldn’t wait to reach the parade square. A rover passed by, I quickened my feet and start jogging. Caught up with one guy, then 2 more and finally the 4th one run with me and soon we saw the parade square! The 2 of us started dashing toward it !! Oh my God …
Upon reaching, I quickly took out the socks, put powder, changed to a layer of white socks covered by another layer of green socks, changed the 2 wet insoles, applied some cool chilling axe oil on my head, nose, eye to keep awake. This time round I got more than 15 minutes because there’re some more guys behind me. All thanks to them that I’ve time to change and pack … heehee … At this point of time, many are having blisters and abrasions problem, I’m still fine, just muscle problems over the sole of my feet, toes and shoulders. Say a little prayer in my heart and we started another 8 km. We reached the destination at 6.30 am the next morning! Finally! It was completed. A good memory in my brain now.

So, the next and last thing is Taiwan. I don’t know if it’s a heaven or a hell? She has a lot of mountains and grave yards. Pls keep me in prayers. Thanks alot ! =0.)

Sincerity

2006-04-19T21:15:00.000+08:00

ASLC is definitely tired. Today I was granted a day leave for helping up Bravo at Pulau Tekong with their live shooting. As I see the Bravo marched into the live range at 0600 hours after a 32 km route march, I could imagine how we gonna be next Tuesday – nevertheless the Spirit and Soul has to be there. This is the finale before going to Taiwan! Marching is my worse nightmare and I have to face it.

So what exactly have I learnt in sispec? Besides those military stuff etc., I also picked up good characters and personalities from the instructors. I felt that I have really learnt things that couldn’t be taught from the textbook, especially like how you react to difference situation with difference perspective. I discovered my weak and strong points in Sispec, I also learnt to do things with a genuine heart. When you are sincere to do something, you don’t have to do it in-front of others. Just do it! Sometime I do felt a little regretted for doing certain things yet nobody know and nobody appreciated my kindness. Haha … Sometime even to an extent of causing negative misunderstanding or losing something … yet the sincerity power always overwhelmed the worries. Because you’ll know you didn’t do any wrongs and you don’t have to be afraid. The peace of God will be with you. Most important of all, you know and God knows you did a great job! That’s enough for me. <--- I’m not that greedy after all! What about you??

Sorry about not updating my blogs for a long time. Basically because of tight timing and also due to some confusion as to what should i write? Many-a-time when I tried to brainstorm, I couldn’t write, probably not enough time? I just got too many stuff to handle, some house chores, church, ministry etc. I wanted to write stuff that can edify people whom read rather that stuff that caused him/her to worry! Anyway, whoever you are, thanks for ya constant support. I’ll always keep you in good prayer. ^_-

ASLC

2006-04-09T00:36:00.000+08:00

8 April 2006
1159 hrs

ASLC is crazy! Because of all the crazy programs, I hardly find myself any time to write my blogs. It is a 11 weeks course and many events have past. 1 day seemed like 2 days to me. Exercises can start as early as 7 am till 12 am the next day. Sometime gotta wake up at 4.30 am and back to sleep the next day 3 am. ß isn’t it crazy? You’ll only get to do these in army. Haha …

Just last Thursday, I finished my platoon deliberate attack Live firing. I’m the acting section commander of the breaching team, the very first man to appear from a hiding point Haha .. 36 of us gathered at a point leaded by our lao jiao, warrant Lim. We were hiding inside the swamp for like 20 minutes. We were like burgers for the mosquitoes. They were busy singing and stinging on us but we can’t move. Miserable! It was total pitch darkness, I can only feel but couldn’t see, nothing at all. Thanks God that the sect comm is blessed with a night vision goggle. I could see my friends and another 36 guys infront of me. (Another platoon) Upon explosion of grenade, they all lie flat on the mud! CRAZY! I quickly off the goggles and pretend I didn’t see anything … haha … soon it was our turn. Me and 2 friends were the very first men to get out of the hiding point, upon stepping into the enemies territories, the backup gunner shoot out an illum rocket to light up the sky. Taufiq planted the bomb, while baby (this friend of mine really named baby in his IC) throw the tape and take cover. I gotta checked and make sure it’s ignited. Shit … gotta run for my life !!! in 30 sec time … it exploded ! Really loud … my heart was touched, physically … by its wave. Then 3 of us gotta ‘chong’ up the stupid knoll again … I was sprinting like a mad man, but my speed was like walking … haha … ya see the picture? Upon reaching the exploded site, (where the enemy fences were bombed) … baby and I on our touch light as a signal for our platoon (33 guys) to charged in … we were all firing live rounds. Very dangerous. Thanks God I’m in the breaching force, I ‘ve to wait till the whole platoon is infront of me before I can proceed on. In another word, no one is behind me … hahhah!!

Quite fun, but taxing too. There’s Fighting in Built up area, watermanship warfare on water, where I got an unforgettable experience in the dirty water of seletar water gap. And many many others …

Last Dark Sky together

2006-03-06T11:33:00.000+08:00

The beautifully light-up guy with

all buttons loosened up and rifle hanging loose is me ... haha ... On the morning of BsLc graduation. Just came back from the route march, everyone was wet. I'm probably one of the dry one ... haha because I WEAR TIGHT!!! plus 2 insoles and 2 layers of socks ... very kiasu ba !!! but that ended up with no abrasion no bister ... Some people could even goes up to 3 layers of socks ... heehee ... Precaution or kiasu ?

From the very left is Tom, then my buddy ShiJun and me! then Ah Tan. The one sitting down is Sam. All the swai Ge ... 0.O

Appreciation VS De-appreciation

2006-03-06T11:28:00.000+08:00

6th March 2006
Monday

Did pretty well during my lower secondary school life. I was a 14 years old chap then. Kind of thinking I’m a little clever and being a little peacock! Did quite well and neglected one thing – appreciation. Infact I didn’t even know about appreciation then. I only knew it in vocabulary. The following year I was promoted to pure science stream then. My ego enlarged its capacity. I thought that this was simple and that was easy, so I didn’t pay my fullest attention to the least things. I skipped lessons when I thought those were easy and it was a waste of time to go. In exchange I ended up in cinema with my 2 morons. Many times, I sleep in class, thinking that these were boring because I ‘knew-how’ already. I was de-appreciating my teachers! I thought what I’m doing were ‘smart-acts’ but infact I’m actually manifesting a kind of disrespect. Yap, it is ok if you skip lessons due to some really genuine reasons but I wasn’t in that sense of mentality then. I skip because I thought I knew the subjects well and wasn’t appreciating the efforts that my teachers put-in. These goes all the way till poly. I was a chap-turned skipping King. Haha …
Even if you know how the subjects goes and what the teachers are going to teach today, it is one thing you’re smart, but wise when you show your appreciation to the least, simple things you thought how. One point, it is rude to de-appreciate. Another point, you’ll never know what you’ll realized when you tried your fullest attention to the borings. You’ll realized new knowledge each time or reinforced on what you had had know!

Due to the lousy standard of attitude that I had towards my studies and all my teachers during secondary school, I became one of the 3 most disappointing students in that particular glamorous class. So Pai~~~sei~~~!! And of course, so sad!!! Bad grades ended up me didn’t even have an O level cert, or probably I lost it because I didn’t care!

Anyway, thanks God that I got to know about appreciation through Christ and it is still being applied even till my daily life and now in my army camp and I believe throughout all my life. Not just in studies, but also to situations, people around you, and all kind of climates you’ll ever imagined!

Appreaciate. Period. =)

Les Miserable

2006-02-28T20:18:00.000+08:00

Jean Valjean. The story Les Miserable is my favourite. It's about how a man action can make a great change. How a little of forgiveness can do wonders, how a willing heart to change can create miracles, how a honest man there was, Here is a story of how it goes ...

After nineteen years of imprisonment for stealing food for his starving family, the peasant Jean Valjean is released on parole. However, he is required to carry a yellow ticket, which marks him as a convict. Rejected by innkeepers who do not want to take in a convict, Valjean sleeps on the street. However, the benevolent Bishop Myriel takes him in and gives him shelter. In the night, he steals the bishop’s silverware and runs. He is caught, but the bishop rescues him by claiming that the silver was a gift. The bishop then tells him that in exchange, he must become an honest man.
Six years later, Valjean has become a wealthy factory owner and is elected mayor of his adopted town, having broken his parole and assumed the false name of Père Madeleine to avoid capture by Inspector Javert, who has been pursuing him. His life takes another turn when he meets the dying Fantine, who had been fired from his factory and has resorted to prostitution. She has a young daughter, Cosette, who lives with an innkeeper and his wife. As Fantine dies, Valjean, seeing in Fantine similarities to his former life of hardship, promises her that he will take care of Cosette. He pays off the innkeeper, Thénardier, to obtain Cosette. Valjean and Cosette leave for Paris.
Ten years later, angry students, led by Enjolras, are preparing a revolution on the eve of the Paris uprising on June 5-6, 1832, following the death of General Lamarque, the only French leader who had sympathy towards the working class. One of the students, Marius Pontmercy, falls in love with Cosette, who has grown to be very beautiful. The Thénardiers, who have also moved to Paris, lead a gang of thieves to raid Valjean’s house while Marius is visiting. However, Thénardier’s daughter, Éponine, who is also in love with Marius, convinces the thieves to leave.
The following day, the students initiate their revolt and erect barricades in the narrow streets of Paris. Valjean, learning that Cosette's love is fighting, goes to join them. Éponine also joins. During the battle, Valjean saves Javert from being killed by the students and lets him go. Javert, a man who believes in absolute obedience of the law, is caught between his belief in the law and the mercy Valjean has shown him. Unable to cope with this dilemma, Javert kills himself. Valjean saves the injured Marius, but everyone else, including Enjolras and Éponine, are killed. Escaping through the sewers, he returns Marius to Cosette. Marius and Cosette are soon married. Finally, Valjean reveals to them his past, then dies.

BSLC Graduation

2006-02-27T01:32:00.000+08:00

24 Feb 2006
Friday

The parade square was brightly light up by candles. A very nice surrounding music with drums were played. Upon stepping into the parade, my spirit was so much affected. Suddenly I felt like a warrior. My friends too I supposed. Because the atmosphere was there. It was very strong.

The whole school was assembled in the parade square. There was approximately 130 trainees per company and 5 companies in the school. Alpha, Bravo, Echo, Foxtrot and Golf. When the whole school BanG! … wow!! It was AWSOME! And when the whole school shouted the school motto … WOW!!! MAGNIFICENT! It was an unforgettable night.

We were preparing for our final march - Our graduation march. It was an approximately 28 km march out of PLC (Pasir Labar Camp) and then into NTU (Nanyang Technological University) and back to PLC. We finished the whole march at 5.30 am the very next day. Up Lar … (spoken in a humorous Indian slang) was our memorable slogan throughout the night. It stands for Good, Marvelous, Great, Thumbs up! Up lar … haha
The very next day at 6.45 am we were back to the parade square. That’s when we graduated from BSLC (Basic Section Leader Course). The colonel gave his long speech while we were in Sedia position (stand in attention) with our full battle order. My feet and knee felt like tofu … Some people behind me fainted and thanks God no one around me faint. But we were all definitely dead sleepy! My neck was feeling cold, think perhaps blood flowing was blocked due to the heavy weight … haha

After graduation, we were informed of our posting. Only 14 guys (including me) were post back to PLC for ASLC (advance section leader course). These posted out people were buddies all the way right from Pulau Tekong to PLC … there’s just a kind of sad feeling. As the 14 of us look down from the corridor at level 4, batch by batch, they were carrying their 2 to 3 mamoth bags of “barang barang”, being dispatched off. We laugh, misunderstood, fight and train together, joke together all kind of silly stuff just fly through our mind. King kong, snorelex, Sun, Ah Tan, to be sgt Loke, and many many more were gone. Tom, the one who dug fox hole 48 hours with me was very sad too. The 38 guys from Pulau Tekong has now reduced into 14. -.-

Later in the day, trainees from other company shifted in. We brief them of the company, the rules and everything. Everyone settle their stuff. My bunk of 15 beds was now fully occupied. Hmm … I wonder how am I gonna do my quiet time ??

Now’s the new phrase of army. ASLC. Who am I gonna meet? How will I ended ?? where will I be? And what will I become? How will I grow? Who will I impart? What will happen ?? These are for God to plan and for me to find out. ^_^

Goodnightz.

Praise

2006-02-19T00:19:00.000+08:00

18 Feb
Saturday

Went to expo for service today. Today's service's really great. I'm sure alot of people was excited by the messages especially the last part ... haha ... One thing really caught my attention, that's the part where Pastor Kong was talking abt parent praising their child and never saying their child stupid! THAT'S RIGHT.

Even if you're not a parent yet, just like me. You and i still got the freedom to praise, maybe your friends? or your brothers? or your sisters? Or anyone you felt the HS leading you to speak that words of encouragement. Praising others triggered the little fire in him/her. Praising him/her give him/her confidence and faith. He/she will felt his/her worth when someone praise him/her ... Never say negative things of a person if you're already negative ...!!! Encouragements can bring a rotten seed into a beautiful strong tree fills with fruits. =)

Summary

2006-02-18T01:08:00.000+08:00

18 Feb 06
0112 Hrs

Hello guys ... it's been awhile since i wrote my blogs. Infact, i still get my revelations and keep my journals. They're all in a little book ... it's just that i didn published out cos i've got no time to edit before i blog. Cos certain personal thoughts and ideas are meant to be personal only ... heez. Haha ... Don't mind yeah ? Anyway ... the last few days have been exiciting, or perhaps the last few weeks actually. I went to Kranji for a 48 hrs overnight non stop digging, yeah, you got it ... i definitely have some experiences to share during that adventure ... and there's also fire movement practices over at the Lim Chu kang Cemetry, and how vagurity seemed so fade when people are at cemetry ...what a funny sight ... and there's also the 4 days as a LPS experiences, no more fire! fire! fire! now, but with lessons learnt applied and i've proved to others what kinda man i am.

Most importantly is the day 11 feb. where my cell group members did a fantastic surprise for me. Honestly i seldom take my birthday seriously. Most of the year i just bought a fav. cake for myself and enjoy it, cos cake is one of my fav. haha ... fattening!(that's why only once a year) But this time is probably an unforgettable birthday for me. Thanks you guys!!! kind of touch till i dont know what to say ...got a shirt from SKIN !!!! went to Cafe Cartel to have dinner together. Most of them are already over 21, looks like i dont get a chance to take my revenge over the sabo they gave !! -.-!

Then finally it's 12 feb. Went to have pizza with my mum and uncle Ho ... looks like it's been sometime since we really spent time together ... so u see ... 21st birthday can just be spent like that .. cosy .. haha ...

Okay ... abt my wonderful adventures ... gotta share with ya all when i sort all things out first ... heez heez ... hereby wanna wish you a great success in all you do .. takecare !

Environment

2006-01-31T17:40:00.000+08:00

22 January 2006
Sunday

Okay … this should be an earlier entry, but because the previous one(An Encounter) was more exciting so I blog out first. Heez …

Sunday again. The last 7 days was just too busy. I didn’t have much time to write down my adventures as almost every single days I gotta get up at 5 am and set-off to Mandai and other field at around 0715 and reached back camp at around 0015 hrs. This is standard! So ya see how desperate I was to sleep !!

There’s certainly a kind of environment in my camp. People can get influenced easily. Valgurity is not a big issue here. It is normal and of cos many other stuff, which you guys know. It’s a fact and a point I can’t escape. But then I realized the greatest enemy is not totally of my surrounding but myself. I remembered a verse that says it’s not the things that enter a man defiles him but that which came out of the man defiles him! Amen!
People definitely came out as how I look at and things happen as how I see them. Positively minded came in! If I always see the negative sides of my friends and the things that are happening, isn’t that making my life miserable!
I admit I was a little self-righteous initially, but then people have their own nature and I have no right to judge. Praise the Lord that I learnt to mix with them but not living in their style. I live in God’s kind of style.
Every single day, I’ll try to add-in the kind of God style into their kind of style and that resulted in a kind of army life-style of a Christian. Haha ~~~~ Of cos, at time I’ll feel discouraged by the different comments given back but come to think of it, it is for God we do our things and not to please manz. So I’ll just gotta be adaptive to the style here and knowing God ever more. I really cherished every Christian faces and moments with the service, cellgroup and ministry cos they just instantly and constantly refresh me!

Honestly, before NS, I thought I’ve a God, and I studied the bible, I ‘ve strength. Then during NS, I discovered a lot of bad points about myself and I’m still way way in need of more improvement and development especially my temper. Others who don’t know of God can even do far better things, far more responsible, sharper, greater tasks. What’s more with me? I’m a nobody. But thanks God that I’m able to realized these and i believe this is GROWinG. =0.)

Okay, now is 2245. Time to sleep and get ready for Mandai tomorrow. -.-! Sad~~~~ But then remember every day is a gift! Precious and uniquely from God. So used it with Zeal!! GooodNightz.

An Encounter

2006-01-30T00:20:00.000+08:00

29 Jan 06
Sunday

Hmm … let me backtracked a bit … On 26 January 06, it was a Thursday. It was a non usual Thursday. It was a beginning of some interesting experience.
Thursday was our exercise W. The exercise was such that we were dispatched into 7 man per group and we have to depend on our map and compass to find certain points in Mandai. We set off for mandai in the morning 0930 hr and supposed to end by 2300 hrs.

There was a little stream in the very north-eastern part of mandai. Right at the center of the stream there a patch of sand and on top of it was a hut. Very spooky. The hut was lock, very small hut, about the size of 4 HDB lift. Definitely no one was living inside. There were signs of torn amulets spotted on the door. I wouldn’t describe much of it but it was definitely … causing my hair to stand. Could it be a store room ? or what ? it looks scary. Out of nowhere came a hut. My instructors urged us not to shine our torch on it while doing a night navigation with him the other day… caused we might see … heez heez … Thanks God my check point for Thursday night was on the western part of mandai. How relieve I felt to believe in God when coming into all these kind of stuff… my friends were all jumping into some “make you more fear and timid” conclusions while I stand in faith with God. Amen!

Very fast, night falls. 7 of us headed west to find our night check point x. We were moving in the deep forestation from 1920 hrs to 2215 hrs when we received a radio to head back to control. Apparently we were unable to find check point x and everyone were extremely exhausted and tired. So we moved South East towards control to get OUT of that place. We bashed through the bad night for 15 to 20 minutes when we realized that one of us lost something VERY IMPORTANT! We have no choice but to move north west back slowly to look for it. You guess it? we were unable to find it, it was like treasure hunt… worse that finding a check point. The whole lots of instructors were called into the search eventually in about an hour time. 7 of us and 10 helping trainees joined in our search too. The rest went back to Zzzz. We searched everywhere we can, we moved through and fore the bad thorns bed I cant really figure out how much distances we have covered. But it was definitely a very thorough combing with the instructors. We search the Mud ground which is like ankle deep for 30 minutes, we search high and low and burnt our torch throughout the night. My friend who lost the important item went stone. All of a sudden he’s like possessed, stone stunner. He fell on the ground. Some of us quickly help him to a side and rest. We combed west 800 metres from our start point again and again especially the knoll where we took a rest during the exercise but just couldn’t find it! Many of us were totally exhausted, it was 0410 hrs then … the instructors and 3 of us just fall on the ground and wait for the next day first light to continue the search. Eventually we just slept. All kind of weird sound could be heard … like a man shouting from a VERY VERY far distance (Mandai is a very big ground, it is connected to Marichie Reservoir) and even a very strange sound like that of a cat or a monkey ?? I don’t know but it’s just totally difference from Tekong. It’s spooky. I was too exhausted to pray then.

At around 0630 hr on Friday where we see the first light, we continued. At 0900 the rest of my company returned to joined in the search. My 2 friends and I plus a few instructors came out of the forest around 1000 hrs and have a cup of milo before we went in and search again. The search become bigger and more people joined in. It went on the whole day until at night when I joined in with Warrant S. Here I got to know something. He asked me if our team ever “Ka jiao” the hut and he told me that our team was one of the few who lost contact with the control the most on Thursday night. My hair stood immediately !!! I asked him what’s it with the hut and he just kept quiet. My God! Now I know why is it that the old warrant in tracker team where I was in the morning make us all the way to the hut to search … something is behind the hut thingy but the old warrants just wouldn’t say. Any way I did searched and looked around it but we didn’t touch it. When this kind of thing happened, I felt more relief of knowing God. Deep in my heart I was praying and speaking in tongues. At around 0330 hrs on Saturday morning, the 7 of us were sent back to camp to sleep. At around 0410 hrs when we were about to sleep, my stone stunner friend who lost the item came to me and asked me to pray for him. Guess it ? yeah … I prayed for him. And surprisingly a Non-Christian friend (one of the 7) who saw us praying joined in too! The 3 of us pray shortly like maybe 3 minutes only? Then we went back to sleep.

At 0700 hrs on Saturday morning, we were sent back to mandai again to assist the search. Guess what? While we were all ready at 0830 hr with all the metal detectors all set up, Someone FOUND it !!! Hallelujah !! When Warrant S got to know about my Prayers he told me that he prayed every night for the last 3 days too!! Believe it or not, the item was spotted at a location where we have been combing very thoroughly on Thursday and Friday. Look … when supernatural things that cannot be explained by logics happened, it’s either fears of illusions OR the Faith of God which also cannot be explained by logics came in! Once again, thanks God. =)

The Incinerator

2006-01-22T16:25:00.000+08:00

15 Jan 2006
Sunday

Sunday. If I’m not wrong it’s been awhile since I do this - Writing my journal under a thin LED Light when everyone is asleep. 1 reason is because I thought I could remembered all revelations I’ve been through and type it all out on a single Sunday when I’m at home, but I’m wronged! I couldn’t recall at all. So here I am, doing the same old thing again, and transfer back to pc when I’m home.

Just book-in. My camp at PLC is fantastic. Once again, I’m in a good position (My bed). Around me, there’re 3 empty beds, and I’m really near the window. So you guess it? I’ve a higher freedom of quiet time. Hee…hee… Out of the window, there is this incinerator which burn almost every single night. Fierce flame just kept fusing out all night. It constantly gives me the picture of a strong igniting fire!! Never giving up and constantly burning. Amen!

Tomorrow it’s gonna be another victorious life for God. Just like the fierce fire of the incinerator.

Today’s a tired day. Service in the morning then bible study on tabernacle and finally dialect service and then book-in. =)

Navigation

2006-01-08T00:59:00.000+08:00

6 January 2006 Friday.

So now it’s 2006, a brand new year with a brand new start. I definitely have a few new resolutions for this year, and one of it is Money! Haha … i just felt that I gotta be wise and careful in handling money from this year onwards. Anyway this is not what I’m gonna tell ya today.

Friday is a very special day. This is the day where I get a first touch of navigation. I was given my first compass in the army. This is not a normal cheap compass, but one that probably cost around 200 dollar. After the lectures on navigation, my friends and I headed straight to the forest. We got a trial in the afternoon at around 4 pm. We are to navigate and find certain points within an approximately 200m by 200m area in the forest.

When night fall, we did night navigation and everyone have to navigate themselves alone. But since the area given was kinda small, occasionally we’ll met each other on the way. It was VERY exciting. The vegetation was COMPLETE superb milo mix as it was raining heavily, many times I was sliding down the slope as if skiing against the snow in a cold country, it was once again pitch darkness! Army seemed to like operating at night.

All of a sudden, I felt how precious and how lovely the compass is!!! Heeheez … the only things I can rely on is the compass then. At a certain point of time, I realized the coordinates slip on my hand was GONE !!! I was very panic then. I lost it, without the coordinates I can’t navigate! … I thought I drop it somewhere so I turn around. Guess what I saw ? Just imagine… At this point of time I realized that a man without a direction in life is really terrible! Everywhere I see are trees after trees, every direction looked similar, even my back looks like my front. I seemed to have forgotten to leave some markings on the trees that I have past. Now I can’t head back. A lesson learnt. I tried to navigate towards north-east … And the rest is a long story.

Here I also wanna add in a very unforgettable quote given by a superior in my school. Life is a matter of 90% how you take it and 10% how you show it! … ~~~~!

HeY

2006-01-02T17:04:00.000+08:00

Hi .. readers. Sorry about not blogging for sometimes. I will tried my best to blog some encouraging entries here. These days were really tightened up, there's alot of events going on and i need alot of rest. i have taken out my background music so that ya can read my blog in yr own music ... hahaha .... anyway ... here wishing ya a HAPPY NEW YEAR. 2006 is here, remember to plan your new year resolution and ideas !

All the best !

15 Dec

2005-12-16T01:28:00.000+08:00

Youngest Julian took 5 days to master cycling. Taught him how to cycle, turn, safety brake, cycle over grassy surface, stones and mud. Taught him how to use standing technique to cycle up a slope, counter uneven ground and unnoticed obstacles…
Also taught him about using full brake, half brake and some ways to reduce speed… how to cycle down really steep slope and how to mountain cycling over grassy slope, how to pump the bike. Explained to him the basic requirements of safety… I also created some scenario to test him … my conclusion is that he learnt fast, but still need more practice. He’s very daring to face the challenges I created. Though can cycle but at times still a little unstable… fall once today… Thanks God he’s not hurt … I think I took 2 weeks to learn cycling, what about you ?

This morning wake up 7 am, reached chinatown at 10 am, pass Karen Lim’s stuff to a elderly, pass photos to Mr Lee and uncle Frankie. Search around whole of Chinatown for “Tong Hai” egg tarts !!!!!!!!! Spent time till 11.30, but still can’t find so I give up. Went to Popular and Bolder looks for a book about games, spent 1 hour but STILL can’t find … what a day. Then went Bugis too. Went there to get Mango Studel for youngest Julian birthday…

Morning = Chinatown
Afternoon = sleep
Night = teach cycling, celebrate Julian’s birthday
Night’s night = read and write blog plus listening to music

God bless ya!!

Prodigal, Prince or Pauper ?

2005-12-15T23:57:00.000+08:00

By Dr Ed Louis Cole

...In communicating at home, Bryce was operating on a military "need to know" baisis, which is good for the military, but not for a wife. "Yes, sir" and "No, sir," may be fine when addressing an offier, but it is not exactly pillow talk. "Reliable communication permits progress," is the principle found in Proverbs. Bryce had to embark on establishing new speech patterns for his home life. He started to give his wife details, and he perfected the art of listening. The new patterns were necessary for right living. The change in patterns brought a change in relationship.
Failure is the womb of success. "Yesterday's dung is tomorrow's fertilizer." Men take what they learn from failure and use it for the platform on which to build a new, successful venture. present success erases past failure. Do you want to overcome all the false starts and failures of your past? Be successful. The greatest antidote to failure is success. You can do it.
God is a specialist at taking what was meant for evil, turning it around, and making it work for our good. It's in the very nature of His transcendent glory. It is His good pleasure to give us the kingdom. He paid the price at Calvary for us to have it. He delights in our having it.
So many men fear failure. Yet, if men never failed, there would be no need of a Savior. We are all prodigals in need of someone to save us from ourselves, as well as from sin. When God installed the first Adam in the Garden of Eden, God made it pleasant and obedience was easy.
God created Adam without a sinful nature, put him in an ideal environment, provided all temporal needs, endowed him with strong mental powers, gave him a life partner to complete him, and gave him duties to engage his mind and body. Above all, God established a personal father-son realtionship between Adam and Himself.
Adam's rupture of that relationship came from an internal desire that produced an external action. The externals in life always begin with the internals. God warned him of the consequences of disobedience. Still, Adam chose self over God, and his disobedience resulted in expulsion from Eden, a symbol of his separation from God and His kingdom. Adam became a prodigal whose progeny were destined to depravity, and man is totally incapable of changing this nature of his. Only God can transform human nature...
Patterns we established in prodigal living need to be changed once we are back in the Father's house. Old ways need to be exchanged for new ones. Thought patterns we learned in prodigal living need to be brought under the Spirit's control to live acceptably in the Father's house. Without change, the old patterns will destroy the new life in Christ.
Such change requires radical action. The prophet Jeremiah talked about it in describing God's divine direction in his life. "See, I have this day set you over the nations...To root out and to pull down,/To destroy and to throw down,/To build and to plant." Before God plants and builds what He wants, it is first necessary to get rid of the existing structure. That's the pattern for constructing a new life when you leave prodigal living...
The more of our old patterns and ways that drop off of us, the closer we are to being where God wants us to be. Breaking the failure cycle is one of life's greatest accomplishments.
Change your ways. You do it by reading the Word constantly, praying, and acting in obedience to what God tells you. The anointing of Gods Spirit not only "breaks the yoke" of sin but is vital to avoid a relapse into old patterns. No man can flee from himself. As with the prodigal, he can only run to the Father to be free from the past...
If we walk in princely power, following patterns set by our heavenly Father, life becomes sweet...
The prodigal in the parable developed a pattern of pleasurable living, without either responsibility or accountability, but he met concrete authority when he found himself without friends, family, food or money. There was only one place to go--back to the father.
Dividing himself from his father, yoked to his insubordination, caused a subtraction of his inheritance, added the burden of poverty, and multiplied his sorrows.
It works both ways.
Subtracting his opposition to his father's will by repentance, adding right thinking, dividing himself from the foreign land, and returning home brought a multiplication of blessings.
God's math is basic.
The choice is yours.
Add. Subtract. Multiply. Divide.
Will it be, prodigal, pauper--or prince?
"Give me' or "Make me?" Two words can change your eternity.

One Desire

2005-12-15T04:26:00.000+08:00

15 December 2005
Thursday

I couldn’t sleep. I was turning here and there. Many things came out in my mind. Just couldn’t sleep. I on the TV, watch a ghost movie in channel 8, kind of stupid show -.-" Then I read an article from guything online magazine about Money and the below are some points …

In order to enter a place you’ve never been, you must leave the place where you are.

Quit praying for opportunity and start preparing for it.

If the sowing and reaping principle of God is intended ONLY for self-consumption, it is NOT the supernatural lifestyle or means of prosperity God has established.

Our role = cross over
God role = rain down from heaven
Compare it with watering your seed by your own?
God says here “…faithfully obey…commands…love the Lord…serve him…with all your heart and soul”. That is to make God the absolute priority of your life - not religion, not church, not the preacher, but God himself.
We have abdicated our Christianity to others and have neglected our personal duty to the Lord. We have given up the highest position of a child of God and surrendered to an institution that tells us what to do. Protestants have no right to criticize the Catholic Church because that is what we are becoming.
To serve God is to do everything you do with His best interest in mind.
It is not a question of what “God’s will” is, or “God’s destiny” for me; it is about what I do with the individual relationship I have in Christ.
Then the purpose of monetary wealth and prosperity is not only for our consumption, it is to be used as a tool to accomplish God’s ultimate plan.
Blessing = a vision for others while curse = consuming God’s favor on your self.
Not a vegetable garden. A vegetable garden gives us the picture of planting, and reaping for the purpose of family consumption. It is not large, but has the ability to meet your needs.

Goodnightz.

Giants Vs God = ants Vs God

2005-12-13T23:46:00.000+08:00

13 December 2005
Tuesday

Today is a fine day. Julian mastered the basic of cycling. Taught him how to cycle straight, speed and safety brake, standing and a little of turning. Today as I studied the sermon of last svc, I realized something…

Do you still remember I mentioned about how my confidence was terribly shattered? Then I met Uncle David who blessed me an audio sermon about Prayer, God spoken to me and I felt a little peace. Then I read a friend’s blog, and she too met with some giants of her life. I was touched by how she could stand up and face her giants and I was greatly inspired by her! Then later, all of a sudden, 2 of my cell brothers ask me the same question and they both gave me 2 differences Spiritual encouragements and advices which I felt greatly helped. And remembered I watched Chicken Little? I wasn’t really interested in it as I don’t really watch cartoons … BUT … that day I just went. Though there’re really enough kids out there, but it was really a meaningful cartoon, you might find it unbelievable but this cartoon spoke to me again! The life of chicken little … haha
Then later on the most recent service, pastor Kong talks about FEAR. I realized when something is repeated again and again more than once, it’s definitely God speaking to you!

True indeed I met my giants too. And the problems were I look at myself like a grasshopper. I was very negative and have little faith. One thing pastor mentioned about fear was that “the only reason for my fear is because I’m not yet fully convinced of God’s love for me” and hence lead me into fear which is the opposite of faith. I do have to admit this. Then another thing that caught my attention was that God allows mountain to be in my way, so that you and I can become mountain mover. Amen! So what’s fear? Fear is a chief emotion uses by satan to rob us of our potential inside of us, why do I fearrRRrr ??? Fear had crept into me … Where is the courage? I had lost it, courage, presence of fear yet the will goes on with FAITH !!!

1 John 4:16-19
v16 And we have known and believed the love that God has for us. God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him.
V17 Love has been perfected among us in this: that we may have boldness in the day of judgement; because as He is, so are we in this world.
V18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.
V19 We love Him because He first loved us.

To the particular friend who faces the same problem as me, if you’re reading this, I hope that you’ve found the same revelation as me too …while you face ya giants, you still have a greater giant in you! He’s not just greater but greatest and praying can help you realized more of Him who is greatest in you..hee!! No matter what, you’re still a child of God and how will He ever forsake you? Right? ThaNks for your lovely entry! :)

To the 2 brothers … haha … you should know who you’re (if you’re reading) … I don’t mind taking bus 854 to hougang then to yishun after service though … heez … so blessed to have friends like you. Definitely not “piggy-dog” friends. Hoho !!! I’m sure your life will be prosperous.

Well … i shall end here. Have an excellence nightz!

Friends

2005-12-12T09:08:00.000+08:00

The 11 people i talk to most in my first 3 months as a soldier.

Pictures

2005-12-10T00:30:00.000+08:00

Haha ... I'm the Top right one... Nice pose ?

Brief Account of Today

2005-12-10T00:09:00.000+08:00

9 December of 2005
Fri-daY

Morning = Julian mastering the aRt of balancing from Hong Shi fu.

Afternoon = Me and younger cousin Jeremy went Mc, then watched Chicken Little at Plaza Sing, then National Library, then Bugis Street, then Sim lim Square then Yishun ... <----- hahahaha

Night = Me tidying up 50% my PC's audios.

I will survive ... a song i got from Chicken Little. Lifting up ya Spirit!
Infact the Chicken Little by C.S Lewis ... is he that C.S Lewis ? Anyway, it's a very encouraging cartoon. Strongly recommended by Hong Shi Fu. Chopped!

Wednesday write on Friday

2005-12-09T10:16:00.000+08:00

7 December 2005 lar
It’s a Wednesday

I just graduated from BMT yesterday. I realized the importance of spending times with people whom were around me before. Today I taught my cousin Julian cycling. I have been promising him since long long long ago, yet I only managed to teach once. Today is in-fact the second time. Then Friday, I’m planning to go out with them, maybe to catch a movie? Hmm … Harry potter. Saturday catch up with my church and friends, Sunday catch up with what I’ve been doing every Sunday before enlisting into Army. Monday maybe to have another lesson of cycling for my cousin Julian… I started to realize the difference of Julian and Jeremy. Julian like sport, he even wanted to learn roller blade from me … while Jeremy likes to read and watch movie. It’s a sense of satisfaction seeing Julian getting to pick up cycling slowly, and Jeremy getting more mature each day. Teaching is a unique and wonderful thing. But some people who taught wrong things are such a bastard. Just can’t understand such people who enjoy teaching wrong stuff.
Ok … I shall stop here for a moment. Looking forward to Sunday!

Prayer

2005-12-08T23:52:00.000+08:00

4 December 2005
Sunday

Today I’m supposed to go for svc 4. But I miss the bus by just 1 minute. I ended up going to service 5 because I got one more ticket with me. All this happened, I believed, divinely. Because … …
I’ve told ya in a previous entry about how disappointed I was with myself. Many things just happened and the negative devil just attacked. I was badly humiliated verbally and I took theirs verbal too seriously that I’ve lost total confidence about myself. Why should I care!! I do not wish to say so much here, but I believe these are just parts and parcels of life. It takes some Christian to overcome though. And today, I would like to tell ya abt this man Uncle David from my zone. I don’t really know him, usually just passerby and a little greeting. BUT! Today, as I was waiting for my friends for svc 5, David saw me awhile, then he said he think he wanted to bless me something. And he got me a sermon abt Prayer!
PRAYER!! Yap … I listen and God spoke to me. God love you and He wants to hear ya prayers, He will answer. But do you put in the work and walk to pray? Effective Prayer is seeking God and seeking God requires devotions!!! Especially when ya’re at your most disappointed moments! Seeking God draw something out of you which is not so easy, true praying is not easy. It requires a certain efforts and then whoever calls onto the LOrD shall be saved. So why should I care abt what they’ve said badly about me? Things have already past. I should be looking ahead and you too if ya’re in the same situation as me!

Philistine

2005-12-03T21:21:00.000+08:00

There are up and down in my life. Sometime I feel so encouraged, so energized, so filled with a sense of purpose and hope thinking that I can always do better, and never give up. But sometime, there are also moments of “down” periods. Where I felt so utterly like a failure, all kind of negative feelings just came out. I even thought that I’ve become a bitter and negative man. Words from the mouth of people hurts, but how I look at myself can kill. At times facing the philistine of myself, I am totally in a lost. Though I know all these, it’s pretty hard doing it. Now, I’m listening to Rechie’s Songs, quite nice, seemed to have bought me to a sunny day where all unhappiness can just be put aside.

Suffered some abrasion, blister and also some confidence break-down today. Nevertheless, the route still have to continue on. The battle with the philistine of my heart is still on, never ending. What have God in store for me? And for you?

Listening

2005-11-27T15:38:00.000+08:00

Cant really blog much these days. Gotta afew things to settle ... and some blogs are just kind of personal to publish out. Hee hee ... anyway, the ghost story in my camp are getting more and more out of hand liao ... they're more and more "exagerated" ... so much more that they're kinda comedy than scary... hahahaha ~~~~~!!! anyway, these days, i seemed to discovered i'm kind of fond to listening over reading. It is so much better when ya pay 100% listening to sermons or even to someone talking, trying to pay your fullest attention and respect to his/her speeches, you'll find it all worth while~~~~

okay, tomorrow is my final IPPT test, i really got to pass it !!!!!! if ya know this, pls keep me in prayer, especially in my chin up and SBJ ...make me 10 kg lighter for chin up, make me able to fly when SBJ ... ^_- Thanks alot !!

Also, over the past few days, i have discovered this thingy call MCF !!!! <---- Military Christian Fellowship !! haha ... God is so good. WWW.MCF.ORG.SG

Today, i'm bringing back some chips and crackers to stuff the mouth of my bunk mates ...

hmm .... 6 th december to Graduation ... time flys ... heez ... takecare all dudes !!

It's a Tuesday

2005-11-13T08:59:00.000+08:00

8 Nov 2005. It’s a Tuesday~!
1312 Hr in the afternoon now. Some people went for their swimming lesson. I passed it hence I’m FREE!! Ha!ha! Hmm … recruits’ life are supposed to be very rush, busy, shagged! But once you get hold of it and of cos become a “gan cheong” spider, doing things before hand, letting all criticisms bypass you, being positive and ENJOY the army life, it’ll be a very “shiok” period of your life. You’ll have time to study bible, joke around and even don’t need to worry your physical health, because you’ll be training HARD! You don’t have to worry of your meal too, as you’ll be provided. You’ll have enough rest each day as it is a chargeable offense for not having a 7 hrs of uninterrupted sleep. These days, training are getting tougher and tougher, so are my physical abilities and endurances. Isn’t that good? The exercises here are progressive, so ya don’t have to worry much if ya think you’re weak. Just put in ya BEST EFFORT in everything ya do and all will turn-out fine for you!! Believe in God, believe in yourself. ^.^ The most important of is, being POSITIVE in every thoughts, DO ya BEST and ya’ll surely find that it’s not really that bad after all. Remember, you’re not gonna be influenced by others, but ya gotta influence! God create you for these! =0.)

Cookies

2005-11-06T15:57:00.000+08:00

Today went to service 4 ALONE!! Supposed to go with a cell group member, but anyway, it’s alright. Well, today was a refreshing morning. Kind of rush, but it’s all worth. The message pastor was talking about is >>> GLORY.
I don’t know why, but ever since I went into national service, I kind of have a special appreciation of God’s words and that atmosphere. I just felt from my own opinion, just like what I have said in a previous blog, when you’re in an extreme darkness, a little of light means a lot to you! Before I got enlisted, people have been telling me of how many brothers were being badly influenced, back-slided etc. after joining the national service. In-fact, it should be exactly the opposite. You should be feeling more peaceful than usual when you step into the church. Every face of a Christian looks so precious to me. Every single words of the bible seemed so encouraging and so warm, warmer than before! I can confirm one thing with you, the NS is not a place where you feared being backsliding, but rather it should be one where you’ll feel more intimate to God. It should be this way. It is a place where you learned to be “gan cheong”, and at the same time, you’ll miss church, and you’ll love God more! Because it’s a place where you’ll have to rely on God many many many times!

Ok … after that, I met up with Lynnie, rAy, Bernard (Sharon cannot make it). Supposely to meet up with these 3. Then while on the way, met Karen Ng and I asked her along. And when I reached there, there’s another 2 friends. Wow! So from 3 become 6. heeheez … kind of weird, because all the other 5 are from one cell group. Nevermind. How nice of lynnie to make cookies for us, it was very very very very well baked. If you know her you should try one. 10ssSSsssssssssssssssssssss~~~~!!! =0.)

And after that went to B2 to get my hp fixed. Went to the woodland branch yesterday, it changed to post office. Here, it became post office too ... What a day ... so have to go all the way down to Orchard, and miss Svc 6... -,-!

'Gan Cheong' Spider

2005-11-03T14:35:00.000+08:00

On Sunday 30th October 2005. My friends and I were happily in the tonner (a huge army lorry) on the way back to company line – end of field camp. I was seating right in-front, all the way inside the tonner. And here right at this place, I encountered >>> e ‘kan cheong’ yellow spider. -.0 Some distinctive features about it was it’s huge size, probably around 50mm? and also the web it leaves behind, bronze in color and very rough, the web was thick and strong. The spider which I mistaken as a wire over my face, the spider which jumped onto my M16, the spider which I then fling away by hitting my M16 against the tonnel vigorously like a ‘mad one’. I think it might be the Golden Orb Web spider. It gets its name from the golden color of its silk. Its venom is generally harmless to humans and they rarely bite even if we blunder into and destroy their webs. The bite is just a scratch. They’re clumsy on the ground … Hmm … all these features seemed quite matching to the yellow ‘gan cheong’ spider I’ve encountered.

Also, people actually used their silk to make fishing net. It is as strong as Kevlar, the strongest man made material which is drawn from concentrated sulphuric acid. In modern times, it may be a major product from uses of parachutes, bullet-proof vests, lightweight clothing, light but strong ropes to many others tendons and ligaments… wow! For more info, please visit >>> http://www.naturia.per.sg/buloh/inverts/nephila.htm

Rubber Plantation

2005-11-03T09:53:00.000+08:00

The rubber plantation was my favorite place. There I have to dig a coffin size hole into the soil for my night, that’s call a shell screed. I was sleeping beside a small tree, my ground was solid red soil, very comfortable and cooling. It was the darkest night of all (Medic Tents are down the hill, not a single source of light). I didn’t get up to go toilet, cos there’s a 98% chance to lost my way, and 99% to drop into others hole. Hahs… and of cos, 99.99% chance to step onto unknown objects, such as >>>shit<<<. So I better stayed in my coffin.
It was a Saturday night, and also the first time I miss a week service. I was praying all night and imagining me in the service worshipping and praising, occasionally there’re air planes flying very low across my sky. The sparkling lights are just BeaUtiFuL, each spark allows me to see my whole body to the boots. The only nature lights were the stars and moon. They were so bright and big, I have never seemed such beautiful night sky! When in an extreme darkness, suddenly I felt light is so so so much precious. When I met with extreme difficulties and totally lost, I felt God is so so so much precious. When I’m in the day, when I’m blessed, I didn’t take light, I didn’t take God whole heartedly, most probably for granted. What about you? Are you like me ?? heeheez … Maybe not God, maybe something you’ve neglected. Anyway, thanks God that it didn’t rain at all on the Saturday night and I guess I enjoyed the most that Saturday night!

Palm Plantation

2005-11-03T02:27:00.000+08:00

The Palm plantation was the most disgusted destination during the 7days field camp. First of all, it was totally wet. The soil was glummy and populated with 'earthly aliens'. At nights creatures were crawling about our leg, my friend and i just kick off. We don't know what were they and we don't wanna know either. I was covered till the eye with grore-tex(rain coat), thanks God for such stuff. Thanks God that i stayed there for just a night only ... haha ... Below are some facts about Queen Termite ...

There's really no such thing as a standard "termite queen". It is true however, that some termite queens are very large (up to 3-4 inches in length and about an inch in diameter), and some lay a lot of eggs in a very short time. In laboratory experiments some species have been shown to lay an egg a second, and so could theoretically lay over 30 million eggs a year! This sort of termite can lay such a large number of eggs for a number of reasons.
First, because she is able to grow massively in size so that her ovaries fill almost her whole body.
Second, because she is constantly cared for by worker termites, and often has a special chamber (the "queen cell") in the center of the nest where she can sit, which is kept at a constant temperature and humidity and away from danger.
Third, because the queen does nothing else except lay eggs and, in any case, is usually too large and bloated to move. This means that if there is any danger the workers have to move the queen themselves, and this does happen sometimes, when ants attack the queen cell, and the workers try to drag the queen to safety. Queens make a very nutritious meal for ants and, in some parts of the world, humans love to eat them too! Yuck!!!

Another stupid insect which i encountered is the big 'gan cheong' yellow spider. That's another story ... ...

Queen Termite

2005-11-03T02:22:00.000+08:00

Queen Termite

A pic. of a queen termite which i mistaken as "worm" and chop off with my ET blade in the Palm Plantation. Oh ... so this is a queen termite... ... Very creepy right? i even have to sleep beside this creature ... Yucks ..

Reclaim Land

2005-11-01T04:42:00.000+08:00

Good Morning !! Hahs … yeah .. I slept at around 11 plus but I just can’t sleep. Guess my sleeping orderly had been disrupted and it would probably take some time to adjust back. Later ya’ll know why. Heez … oh! That include my appetite, I seemed to have become a “crazy” desperado for food. That’s bad. -.O FLOOD. This word really haunted me. It was raining at least 5 days out of the 7 days and most of the nights rained heavily. I was really flooded while sleeping at night. I can even recall the moment where I’m having a really bad flu with up-terrible running nose, wearing my gore-tex (SAF rain suit) holding on to that piece of lousy metal digging and digging for the drain of my tent. … The soil just became muddy and my whole boots seemed to sung in to the ground. Upon take off your step, your boots will seem 2x heavier and more colorful. It was very sticky too, yucCckssssS!! Gore-tex is like my only precious means of survivor in these 7 days, it saved me from creepy “yuckies” and the bad weather!! The ground sheet I was possessing wasn’t waterproof at all, it was in real bad condition, the worse things is that my buddy is holding onto bad groundsheet, and also 3 superb lousy tent pins, I still remembered how torturing it was to force the spoiled tent pins into the muddy milo ground with heavy rain above me! Manz … first things that came into my mind was, GoD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! … that’s the first day experience in the first reclaimed land => 8km route march away from Basic Military Training School 2. Thanks God commando Mosquitoes wasn’t a big problem for me as my blood wasn’t sweet, hahs … mosquitoes just don’t really like to suck my blood. But my tent was really terribly flooded and almost to collapse in the middle of the heavy “storm” night. My gore-tex was pull fully all the way leaving only my eye and lower part of body not covered, I’m just stucked then.

2nd station was reclaimed land too, but at 2 km away. Some of my friends and I reached there first at about 20 minutes faster then the whole company as we were helping up in loading the stuff to the lorry. I was very urgent to release some water. The PS told me to go 12 o’ clock direction as far as possible to do my business. I guess I reached a certain distance, then I pee. The things is I don’t know why, when the rest reached and all tents built-up, THERE WAS A FEW TENT OVER THE PEEING AREA … hahahahahahahahhahahaa ~~~~~!!! Manz … this is army lor … Anyway, I guess they’ve an outstanding night, they kind of enjoyed it. ^.^!!
So, back to 2nd destination, the location where I built my tent was good, near the medic, short grass, with medic light shinning in, so I don’t need much touch… heehee! But it was raining too, and it rained 1 whole night, my fingers was horribly numbed on that 2 nights there. Ok, next entry I will talk about the most creepy and disgusted PALM plantation …… YucCccksSSsss …… ~~~~~~ Goood Day to you!

Field Camp Experience Day 1

2005-10-31T23:25:00.000+08:00

Hi, I’m back from my 7 days jungle trip. It was unforgettable. I’ve got a lot to talk about it. First thing first, I must really thanks God for His presence. I’ve got sensitive skin which got rashes easily and I went field camp with a slight fever and bad sore throat, YET! I was one of the minorities who didn’t get any rashes throughout the whole 7 days. Praise God. And also, I actually recovered from my sickness during the field trip. Wonderful. It was a whole 7 days experience. I’ve learnt what it’s like when you engaged in a war, things just came unexpected. You got to prepare expecting the unexpected. All I can described in a word is => pitch darkness. Yeah, when the night fall, it was a totally complete darkness, you can’t even really see your fingers, and you have to navigate ya ways through the darkness with a little touch light. Heeheez …
First and second stop was the reclaim land where commando mosquitoes are famous for. 2nd stop was the palm plantation where it was a complete disgusting creepy shit land. And the last stop, rubber plantation was the best land of all. And sleeping in my own dug grave hole was the most memorable night I’ve been during the 6th day. Heehee … … To Be Continue … …

RELATIONSHIP

2005-10-22T23:42:00.000+08:00

Today Saturday, 22 October’05. I’m just having a slight fever and very bad sore throat, feeling kind of dizzy. I hope to make it for Monday, as I will be going for field-camp liao and I guess there’ll be lots of shouting. Some thoughts just came into my mind while resting today. Most of my bunk mates have girlfriends and I’m the minority. Am I limiting my youth? i just felt that it is always better for guy to finish NS and girl to finish schoolings before getting into a relationship, a healthy one. Mentality, likes, dislikes, responsibilities, accountabilities every-things will definitely changed upon that age. What’s wrong with that? What’s your opinion? Some people think that I might not have any relationship experiences then … Well, I rather have it with no experiences then to hurt someone feelings … What’s wrong with that? So am I limiting my youth? Enjoyment of youth is not just about having many relationships … break off, then new girlfriend again and so on. Bitter.

These days I also realized that it is not just applying what ya learnt from God to ya workplace so that ya can rise in position? But also what ya can learn from your workplace applying to God’s kingdom.

Aiz … still a bit dizzy. Have a good night. Never give up your dream despite it is going to become hopeless … it can be resurrected if only you persevere! Excuse me if I had wrote any nonsense above, I’m really DddddZzzzzz… 0_O

STRENGTH

2005-10-15T10:08:00.000+08:00

12 October 2005
Wednesday

Ps 59:9 You are my strength, I wait for you to rescue me, for you, O-God, are my place of safety.

Today went to take my IPPT Cat Test. Got a 9.48 mins for my 2.4 km run. 9.9 sec for shuttle run, 46 sit-ups, 216 for standing board jump and 2 pull up only -.-

God is indeed the source of strength. Mentally and physically too! Without Him, I don’t think I can achieve such endurance especially while running. Although I fail due to Chin-up, yet I’m not gonna give-up. This is the process of a JOURNEY. Mentally is another story I will tell another time if possible. And I believe I can achieve a better result for SBJ and 2.4 km. ^.^
Today also chat with RedCross (Xue Yu) for awhile while waiting for others to finish their Marksmanship test. From the conversation, I expressed all that I felt about some silly things that I’ve done 2 years ago and how hurting that was. HaHa … this is another story. But really thanks God that I’m able to express my innocence to one of that few KPOs … sometime really “hated” them for being nothing better to do, haha but who knows that “red-cross” was brought into my army life and I’m able to express every thorns to him so that he can bring back to his group of KPOs how bad they were !! heehee … Praise the LorD.

… the time now is 2300 Hrs approximately. Everyone is asleep liao. I really miss dialect church. The elderlys and the workers faces just kept appearing on the ceiling (spoiled fans?) Spoil radio from someone’s mouth kept surfacing ?? heehee … just kidding. It’s been awhile since I put aside a certain time of my week just for God. This coming sun there’ll be a outing for the elderlys, I’m looking forward to it. This Taurus Company platoon 2 is a little unique. There’s the good side of it and the bad side of it … anyway, it’s a good company. Thanks for ya prayers, especially those who really pray for me, you’re simply wonderful!

Goodnightz!

11-10-05

2005-10-15T10:06:00.000+08:00

11 October 2005
Tuesday

Ps 54
Come with great power. O God, and rescue me! Defend me with your might. O God, listen to my prayer. Pay attention to my plea. For strangers are attacking me; violent men are trying to kill me. They care nothing for God. But God is my helper.
The LorD is the one who keeps me alive! May my enemies plans for evil be turned against them. Do as you promised and put an end to them. I will sacrifice a voluntary offering to you; I will praise your name, O LorD, for it is good.
For You will rescue me from my troubles and help me to triumph over my enemies.
Now 0712 hr in the morning, everyone is sleeping, waiting for further instructions. My environment is challenging. I need God, His words allow me to find Him. I’m reading Ps 54,55. Way way way behind the church bible reading schedule! Read an article about Ps 55 too --- … the real shame is shamelessness that denies wrong doings and thus neither seeks nor receives forgiveness … we need to realize that real man don’t hide behind fragile egos – they come clean about their shortcoming, and they grow strong through admitting their failures.

Ps 55:22
Give your burdens to the LoRD, and He will take care of you. He will not permit the Godly to slip and fall.

Ability Group Running

2005-10-15T10:01:00.000+08:00

10 October 2005
Monday

Just went for AGR – Ability Group Running. Hmm … felt that my stamina have improved. This week is once again refreshed. Don’t know why, my lifestyle seemed to have a twist now. Every sat and sun I’ll get spiritual feedings, and Monday when back to camp, I felt recharged, renewed. I kind of like these. :o) Now, “redcross” is seating besides me, also known as Xue Yu, who is in the same church and zone as me. I am not sure how the next few weeks gonna be like, but I know HOPE will be around. Everyone is taking a 5 minutes break now, for a lecture about grenade. This is a good time for me to seat down and reflect, beside this grace of time. The rest of the day are just too rush and busy! Time now is 1000 Hr. I’ll stop here for awhile.
Now 1240 Hr. Just finished lunch and got to fall in at 1315Hr for IMT – Individual Marksmanship Training. Kind of free now, while serving NS, you got to be firm to your stand. Do not be easily sway, uproot by the storm (disappointments) you’ll surely meet. Then you’ll find that God is with you. SUCCESS IS A JOURNEY! NOT A DESTINATION – a very nice quote on a keychain given by a very nice Lynnie Choo … Thanks! ^_- … see it’s the journey that really matter.

Certain Limit

2005-10-09T13:03:00.000+08:00

1 cor 1:2
We are writing to the church of God in Corinth, you who have been called by God to be His own holy people. He made you holy by means of Christ Jesus, just as He did all Christians everywhere - whoever calls upon the name of Jesus Christ, our LorD and theirs.

It's a Thursday 6th of October lurking in the year 2005.

It's been awhile since i really write down my reflections. Army life is definitely tough. Mentally challenged. Indeed, i'm a Christian supposed to be called to be Holy - set apart for God only. My friends here are friendly, that's good. I can mix around well with them. But there're just a certain limit, i don't seemed to be able to appreaciate certain things which i think are against God, with them! Sometime, i really have no confidence of myself. Where's God? The only source of confidence. Many a time i feel like praying aloud like in Church ...

Walking on The Right Path

2005-09-29T21:03:00.000+08:00

Tuesday, 27 September’05.
John 3:12 But if you don’t even believe me when I tell you about things that happen here on earth, how can you possibly believe if I tell you what is going on in heaven ?

0700 Hr. I’ve just taken my breakfast, finished doing bunk-cleaning. Everyone seemed so dried-out and exhausted, probably because of the physical training? Anyway, thanks God that I’m still okay. Most of them are back to bed sleeping. My friend Isaac is now playing his superb mini-guitar, sound nice, and all the more making the rest deeper into their sleep. So far, I realized Isaac, Wei Keng and Chan Ye are the non-sleeping freaks … haha!

1425 Hr now, time flies huh. Whole lots of us just came back from the morning activities and trainings etc and now kind of VERY free. Everyone’s sleeping again! Haha … Isaac is still playing his mini-guitar bringing a certain atmosphere into the bunk. Hmm … let me recall … till this day, I guess I’ve learnt quite something. Till this day, I’m still standing firm to my ground, especially in the area of vulgarity. God is around. Don’t know why, I just felt that He has something prepared for me ahead. Right now I should be preparing for it. As long as I’m clear and pure before Him, He has something wonderful ahead of me, even when it doesn’t look good now. Faith requires patience.

True indeed, if I don’t even believe what He promises on Earth, what about heaven?

Changi Chapel

2005-09-22T21:45:00.000+08:00

Wednesday, 21 September’05.
Ps 73:1 Surely God is good to Israel, to those who are pure in heart.
Ps 73:2 But as for me, my feet had almost slipped; I had nearly lost my foothold

1336 hr. Now waiting for the OO lecture. I shall talk a little about my trip to changi chapel yesterday. The place itself was completely filled with the strong presence of the Holy Ghost! I realized serving NS is not just a duty, it’s about protecting our nation. Being bought back to 1942, I felt in me the importance of seriousness for NS. Although it’s pretty peaceful now, but the history of Japanese occupation is never a story. It’s a reality with real sufferings. If all Singaporeans men are not serious about their serving in NS, then what’s the use of it? The particular chapel, a traditional style, with wooden benches on both side, a pathway that link right up to the cross from the main entrance, on the alter, with Jesus Christ on the cross, candles and prayer lists where prayers for the heroes are being prayed for. I took my cap off, say a prayer in my heart. I just know God is there. Truly, He is good, to those whose hearts are pure, I believe He’ll guide me through my NS days. Well, I’ll definitely visit the chapel again!

Praised God for one of my bunk-mates, Issacc who is now seated on my right side. A catholic. At least he know about the Holy book too. This guy seemed quiet and alone-style ranger, yet seem so gifted in so many things! I pray for him that God be with him.

One article I come across in Changi Chapel touches me. A worldly normal man and a prince of church, a bishop can come together in a prison cell sharing the same thoughts during their days as POW. This changes my whole perspective of views.

Now ... feeling very tired. Goodnightz.

Miss

2005-09-22T21:44:00.000+08:00

Tuesday, 20 September’05 was a back to basic day. The military school bought us back to mainland for a heritage tour to 3 places. The most captivated destination is the Changi Chapel. =)

After 13 days in BMTC2 Taurus Company 2 section 2, I think I have kind of adapted to the life here. Definitely, I’ve miss a lot of the friends I know back in mainland. Here, it seemed like only God is still with me, 2 days are like 20 days to me here, I miss my family and PFLC and many other good friends, but thank God, He is still with me.

I quite enjoy my stay with Taurus 2 people, they’re actually quite nice people, I’ve yet to discover each individual substance (things they really individually good at) but I just feel they’re people who gonna do good after NS (at least some of them).

Today also went to Changi Chapel Museum and learnt quite something about Japanese Occupation, Christianity and hope. And that’s another story. I love God, I love my family and friends and I miss PFLC.

Fire! Fire! Fire!

2005-09-22T21:42:00.000+08:00

11 September, Sunday’05 was a fine weather. Yet my heart wasn’t fine but stormy, filled with heavy rains, lightings and thunders. I wasn’t sleeping well for the past 3 days(or probably the first 3 days). I have been up in the night practicing those malayu words under the blanket. Yap, I was very nervous. I was given such HEAVY responsibilities on my first touch to army stuff especially marching etc. I’m definitely not prepared. I screw out everything, I was badly reprimand by the platoon sergeant and my platoon officer, and the sergeant who look me up was too embarrass to face them.

10 September on the Saturday morning I was being brief about the fire drill stuff. I wrote down everything. 2 times I was meeting the section leaders, and for 2 times I didn’t manage to tell them everything. It was so rush! The days are really packed! Got to fall-in here and there and prepare this and that for the whole platoon. Besides, I’m even a new blood in all this uniform thingy. I did what I can. The same day, 2030 hr, ‘FIRE!’’FIRE!’FIRE!’ rang, I’ve definitely disappointed many people. -.- The whole platoon was caught in a sudden moment, the whole platoon didn’t bring their FAD. I was badly XXX by the officer. In 3 days, the -?-?-?-?- is changed. But this 3 days look like 30 days to me. It was the most unforgettable and most touchable periods of my life in the army. Kind of sad, but kind of thankful too, these bad experiences surely have pierced into my mind.

Delirious

2005-09-08T01:21:00.000+08:00

07-09-05 Wednesday
=0.)

Today I’m very happy. Some of the happiest day ever entered in my journal. I will not say more here. HaHa… Quite excited too, tomorrow going NS. Everything is packed, waiting for tomorrow. Goodnight.

Hmm … to a certain friend, hope you like what I’ve bought. Please make the effort to read ar, because I knew about this book long ago and spent some time looking for it from 2 difference bookstores. But I’ve not really read the whole book, just probably 3 pages ? Heeheez … … Take care !!

Today, also chat with my Spiritial Influential, she treated me Mcdonald while I in-return bless her mooncakes… Hahaha. She gave me some words of wisdom and encouragements, not just about army but also about my young life. What she said is said by every genuine spiritual leader in the church too. And I pray God will be in the mist of everything you and i are going through now. God bless you~~~!!

Goodnight again.

Personal

2005-09-06T22:03:00.000+08:00

One man once wrote that True Spirituality was expressed by Peter in his famous last words: “Grow in the special favor and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ”
(2Peter3:18). A similar thought is also expressed at the beginning of the letter: “May God bless you with his special favor and wonderful peace as you come to know Jesus, our God and Lord, better and better” (2Peter1:2). This man then continue saying that Spirituality is the knowledge of Christ, which starts with an INTELLIGENT understanding of the biblical and historical data concerning Christ and then develops as we discover the reality of his presence and power in our lives.

The Intelligent in my own context is not smart or brilliant but one who is available, willing and teachable.

Knowing Christ and discovering his special favor serve to enlarge my capacity of living in accord with God’s divine plans. It brings back to basic, the original purposes! But it doesn’t come automatically, I’ve to seek. … …

YOU too!! You’ve to seek too. This blog is specially for you. You’ll know who’re you because I promise you that I’ll upload a certain personal entry? Remember? But I think I really can’t, sorry about that. But =0.) Ya know what? This is not a simple entry wo … this took me altogether 1 day and 2 night to write … intended for you. Just wanna say that no-matter what you did and what happen to you, always returned back to your first love with God! No-matter what, don’t strife for fame and for man to see, but it’s all about you and God only. =0.) ...
So ... let us grow together into strong faith lovely children of God! Yeah ?^_-